The Janus Files 2 -- Fortune Cookie Philosophy

Fortunezord!

2012-01-23T17:06:00.004-05:00

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Happy New Year! (Again.)

Today is the Chinese New Year. I have to admit, I was a little surprised when I looked at the calendar a couple of weeks ago, and saw that it was today. This may be the earliest I can remember the Chinese New Year occurring.

I'm writing this in Mall St. Matthews. About the time I walked into the mall, I began hearing this rumbling in my stomach, one that was saying quite plaintively, "FEED me, Seymour!" (Which is a little surprising, since my name isn't Seymour.) That was about the time I realized that I had not eaten very much today, and that getting something to eat might not be a bad idea. And the sooner, the better.

The mall's food court meant that I had a dozen or so different choices. And since today is the Chinese New Year, I quickly narrowed my choices to Chinese Gourmet Express.

From what I have seen, Chinese Gourmet Express is about the same as most mall food court Chinese restaurants. They have a dozen or so different selections, which are served with your choice of noodles or rice. This time, I chose the sesame chicken with noodles. (I almost always get noodles over rice.)

The food was nothing I haven't had before. It tasted great, and more importantly, it stopped that rumbling in my stomach. And of course, it also came with a fortune cookie. The fortune read as follows:

"You have a deep appreciation of the arts and music."

Okay, I suppose that does describe me somewhat.

Today is the beginning of The Year Of The Dragon. Unfortunately, this year, the closest thing I have to a dragon joke is an early Power Rangers reference in the title.

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A Fortune "Bookie"?

2012-01-13T17:15:00.003-05:00

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The Chinese New Year comes early this year, and my local library branch is getting into the spirit of things. When I went by the Bon Air branch earlier today, there was a big bowl at the circulation desk, and a sign inviting patrons to take a fortune cookie.

I'm never one to pass up material for an entry, so I walked over to the bowl. The "fortune cookies" weren't edible. They were made from mini muffin cups that had been folded into the proper shape. And it looks as though the fortunes were printed by the library's staff. If the one I got is any indication, all of these fortunes have to do with books and reading:

"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense."

Oh, yeah. I've definitely heard that one before, with a slight variation. And I find myself wondering what some of the other fortunes say.

Now that I think about it, wouldn't a better name for these be fortune book-ies?

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Whirl Away!

2012-01-06T15:26:00.005-05:00

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Earlier this week, I was going by a church near my condo, and I saw the following message on their sign:

"Visualize world peace."

I have seen this sentiment expressed in a number of ways over the years. Besides that sign, I have seen it on buttons, T-shirts, and bumper stickers. I remember that at one place where I worked, a receptionist had the message on her desk. If I'm remembering correctly, it was on a paperweight. I do remember that it was readily seen by anyone walking by her desk.

But I suppose the thing that comes to mind most readily whenever I see that message is something similar that I saw on a button. It was one of dozens upon dozens of buttons that you can find for sale at any SF convention. Most of the messages will, of course, have something to do with the genre -- something like "Captain Archer, why did you just say, 'Oh, boy'?"

But in this case, the message was a somewhat snarky twist on the message above. I will admit, at first, I didn't get it, mainly because I don't think I had seen "Visualize world peace" previously. But the dealer explained it, and I quickly understood. And now, I cannot see that message without this version quickly coming to mind:

"Visualize whirled peas."

Oh, and that receptionist I mentioned? I wrote the alternate version on a sheet of paper, and when I went by her desk, I gestured to her paperweight, saying, "I've got another version of that." I showed her the paper, and she started laughing.

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Happy Birthday, Dr. Asimov

2012-01-02T19:13:00.003-05:00

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Today is Isaac Asimov's birthday. Were he still with us, he would be 92 -- and I find it hard to believe that it has been almost 20 years since he died. I thought I would mark the occasion by listing a couple of favorite quotes of his:

"Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent."

"Writing, to me, is simply thinking through my fingers."

I just wish I could think through my fingers as quickly as he did.

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A Fortune-ate Beginning To The Year

2012-01-01T19:00:00.004-05:00

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Happy New Year, everyone!

Early this morning, I decided to start 2012 by diving into the bag of fortune cookies for a little bit of inspiration. And what I got was my first duplicate of the year:

"You have a friendly heart and are well admired."

I took this as a sign that I should try again. The second time I pulled out a cookie, the fortune was something I had not yet encountered:

"A thrilling time is in your immediate future."

Hmmm . . . that sounds like an auspicious start for the year. Here's hoping that I'm right.

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Another Christmas Wish

2011-12-31T16:31:00.002-05:00

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There was one other sign with a Christmas wish that has stuck in my mind. And yes, I know that Christmas was almost a week ago. If I don't mention it now, I'll probably forget about it by the time December 2012 rolls around.

This sign was in front of another school in Louisville; Assumption High School, to be precise. And like the message on Goldsmith Elementary's sign, I'm guessing that the message won't be changed until after everyone comes back to school. I'm guessing that will be this coming Tuesday or Wednesday at the earliest. I liked the wording of this particular sign message, which is probably it has stuck with me:

"May love light the world at Christmas."

As with the other sign, it's probably something that should be kept in mind throughout the year, not just at Christmas.

I hope all of you have a Happy New Year.

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Not Much Of A Difference

2011-12-28T18:36:00.003-05:00

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With the holiday craziness finally over, I went by Mid-City Super Buffet for lunch today. I was curious to see what changes, if any, had been made since #1 Asian Buffet had closed several months ago.

In a word -- not much. As I noted when I went in to pick up one of their takeout menus, the decor looked the same. The arrangement of the booths and tables, the location of the sushi bar and buffet tables -- same places. I'm guessing that the new owners/management didn't feel the need to make any sweeping changes to the place that were not necessary.

After being shown to a booth, I shed my jacket, backpack, and helmet, and went to the buffet. My first stop at any Asian buffet is usually the sushi bar. I was a little disappointed by the sushi selection. Now, it may have been because the restaurant had not been open too long when I arrived, or it may be that the selection may be more limited at lunch, but the only choices available were various rolls -- including a very good cream cheese roll. I was hoping for some nigiri sushi, but they didn't have any at the time.

The food was your typical Asian buffet fare, including such exotic Chinese dishes as French fries. (Okay, I'm guessing that most of these places have fries because it will be something that keeps the younger kids happy.) I made several trips to the buffet, eating until I was pleasantly full. I think I found the secret to avoid that feeling of having a lump of spent uranium in your stomach -- take your time to enjoy the food. Don't be in a rush.

And of course, the meal ended with a fortune cookie. My fortune read as follows:

"Your wealth is where your friends are."

Okay, this makes it sound like my friends are picking my pocket.

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MoreThan A Pattern

2011-12-26T17:55:00.002-05:00

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I decided to pull another couple of cookies out of the bag from GFS today. I've been on the road over the weekend visiting my family, and for whatever reason, I decided that I was in the mood for a fortune cookie.

This time, I finally pulled my first triplicate fortune from the bag. I had a feeling it would happen eventually; I was just curious as to when. On the other hand, the other cookie was a fortune I had not seen before now.

The duplicate -- excuse me, triplicate -- fortune was:

"All your hard work will soon pay off."

And the numbers and mini-Chinese lesson was the same on this one as it was on the other two bearing the fortune.

The fortune I was seeing for the first time read as follows:

"You have a friendly heart and are well admired."

This is where I want to start borrowing a line from Bugs Bunny: "He don't know me very well, do he?"

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Christmas Wishes

2011-12-25T14:01:00.004-05:00

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I trust all of you are having a very Merry Christmas. at the very least, I'm hoping that you're enjoying the day off.

I thought that today, I would share something I've been seeing on a sign for the past couple of weeks. The sign belongs to Goldsmith Elementary School, which is only a few blocks away from where I live. Since it's on the way to my local library branch, I usually see it at least a couple of times a day.

If I'm not too mistaken, this message was put on the sign outside the main entrance during the first week of December. At this point, I'm guessing that the message will stay there until after the beginning of the new year:

"Children need your presence more than they need your presents."

Probably a good thing to keep in mind year-round, and not just at Christmas.

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Stuck On Me

2011-12-22T13:50:00.003-05:00

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When I got home last night, I stopped by my mailbox on the way up to my condo. For reasons unknown to me, someone had placed a refrigerator magnet on my mailbox. I had to remove it before I could open my mailbox, and after looking at it, I decided to take it with me.

The magnet was much like many of the buttons I have. It bore a short message that falls into the category of what I have dubbed "fortune-ish." And it appealed to my sense of humor:

"I can only please one person per day. Today I choose me."

As I said, that's going on my refrigerator.

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Cookie-Less Fortunes

2011-12-16T18:06:00.000-05:00

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While I was reaching in the bag of fortune cookies a couple of days ago, I happened to notice something. I saw a couple of fortunes that weren't inside cookies.

I have no idea how how these fortunes became separated from their cookies. I'm guessing that the most likely explanation is that some of the cookies have been broken from the bag being handled at various times, and the jostling separated the fortunes from the cookie fragments. I'm not particularly in the mood to think of alternative suggestions, in any case.

I plucked the orphaned fortunes out of the bag, and thought I might as well use them in an entry of their own. And it turned out that this pair is split -- I've pulled out one fortune before, but for the other, it was the first time I've encountered it. (At least so far.)

"If you wish to, you will have an opportunity."
(This was the second time I've seen this fortune.)

"The reward of a thing done well is to have done it."

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Double Double

2011-12-15T17:56:00.002-05:00

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It has been a while since I pulled a fortune cookie out of the big bag I bought early this year. Last night, I pulled a cookie out of the bag. It was yet another duplicate fortune. So, I decided to try again, and pulled a second cookie out of the bag. You guessed it; it, too, was a duplicate.

I don't have the original fortunes readily at hand, so I can't compare the lottery numbers to see if they are true duplicates. But based on previous experience with this bag, it's a pretty safe bet to guess that they are. Here are the duplicate fortunes:

"Soon you will be sitting on the top of the world."
"Your future brings cheerful company and merry times."

Well, the latter does seem to be appropriate, seeing as how Christmas is just around the corner.

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Restaurant Regeneration

2011-12-14T16:15:00.009-05:00

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This is something that happened back in May, if I'm not too mistaken. At least, I remember it happening around Derby time.

At the time, I was making a trip to Mid-City Mall. More than likely, I was going to the Highlands/Shelby Park branch of the library, which is located there. But as I was coasting up to the mall's entrance, I noticed something unusual at #1 Asian Buffet. It was closed.

No, I don't mean closed in the sense of "not yet open for the day." I mean CLOSED, as in "shut down for good."

I was a little surprised, because when I went to Mid-City Mall a few days earlier, they were open as normal. The closing was abrupt, to say the least. And a few days after that, I was again coasting up to the entrance of Mid-City Mall. I was talking briefly with someone, and for some reason, we were talking about the restaurant's closing. The other guy wasn't sure, but he told me that he thought he had heard something about the health department closing #1 Asian Buffet down after a routine inspection.

Well, that isn't out of the realm of possibility. The local health department does have the power to do that. Given that it doesn't happen often, I'm surprised that I didn't read or hear anything about it in the local news.

The space remained occupied through the summer. Then either in late September or early October, I saw a sign that a new restaurant would be opening soon -- Mid-City Super Buffet.

It finally opened last month, but I haven't had a chance to dine there yet. As best as I can tell, it's an entirely new restaurant -- new management and everything. I have stepped in a couple of times, to pick up their take-out menu, and it doesn't look as though the decor has changed.

I plan to go there for lunch before the end of the month. It will be interesting to see what changes have been made.

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Looking For Some Hot Sauce . . .

2011-12-09T17:15:00.003-05:00

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As I mentioned a couple of entries ago, sometime last year, Taco Bell introduced two new sauces at their restaurants. I wrote about the Border Salsa Verde previously. The other new sauce is the Fire Roasted Border Salsa.

As was the case with the Salsa Verde, the packets of the Fire Roasted Salsa had new fortune cookie-like messages printed on them. The Salsa Verde messages seemed to have more of a humorous bent to them, with several of them relying on "green" puns. The messages on the Fire Roasted Salsa, used puns relating to fire and heat. They also seemed to be slightly . . . edgier, for lack of a better term, in their humor. At least that's the way I perceive it. Here's the list; I'll let you judge for yourself:

"Dibs on the taco."
"Give me some knuckles."
"Have your people call my people."
"I see how you look at other sauces."
"I'm a people packet."
"I'm gonna be Fire for Halloween."
"I'm not just another pretty face."
"I'm with the band."
"Is it me, or is it hot in here?"
"I've been through fire for you!"
"Let's go get matching tattoos."
"Taco me."

Okay, maybe "edgier" isn't the right word, but I'm not certain what is.

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A Sign Of Wisdom

2011-11-30T18:16:00.002-05:00

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I'm sure if you drive by most churches, you will see an announcement sign of some sort. Most of the time, they usually post information on the sermon for the following Sunday's services. Occasionally, they will post some fortune cookie-like words of wisdom.

This is one that I saw probably back in the spring of this year. If I remember correctly, the church that posted this left it on their sign for a couple of weeks, which is probably why it has stayed in my mind:

"Tradition means protecting the fire -- not preserving the ashes."

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In Brightest Day, In Greenest Sauce

2011-11-26T15:37:00.004-05:00

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This particular entry has been waiting to be written for some time -- probably close to a year, if I'm not mistaken.

It was about a year ago that Taco Bell introduced two new sauces at their restaurants. One of those is their Border Salsa Verde, and that is the subject of this entry.

As I said, I'm not completely certain when I first saw packets of the Border Salsa Verde at Taco Bell, but I'm pretty certain it was about this time last year. And when I picked up a couple of packets, I noticed that they had some of the fortune cookie-style messages printed on them -- just as Taco Bell has had on their sauce for a couple of years now. But as I noticed that the packets had new messages -- and that the Salsa Verde packets had messages specifically designed for the sauce.

I've been picking up packets for a few months, and by now, I'm certain that I have collected all of them -- for the moment, that is. I've found 12 different messages, and here they are in alphabetical order:

"Add a little verde to your life."
"Did the paparazzi see us together?"
"I'm green with envy."
(Yes, they are going to be big on the green puns with this set.)
"I'm not just a sauce; I'm a way of life."
"Imagine a world without sauce . . . sorry, I need a moment."
"Is green a good color on me?"
"It would be an honor to sauce your food."
"Kiss me, I'm Irish."
(And when did the Irish put colonies in Mexico?)
"Sauce has taken on a whole new greening."
"Take me to your leader."
"'Verde' is fancy for 'green.'"
"Verde (vur-day)."

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Way Too Far

2011-10-28T18:44:00.002-04:00

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A couple of weeks ago, I found a button that I picked up at a convention . . . well, I'm not completely certain when. Let's just say that it was several years ago. I've been wearing it frequently since I rediscovered it, because it seems rather applicable right now:

"The Bill Of Rights went too far: They should have stopped at 'Congress shall make no Law.'"

As I said, it seems rather applicable, doesn't it?

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Sticker A-Peel

2011-10-10T17:52:00.004-04:00

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A few weeks ago, I bought a bunch of bananas while I was grocery shopping. I picked up a larger bunch than I normally do, because I noticed that it had several of the "fortune-ish" stickers on the bananas. (Okay, I actually peeled off a couple of stickers from other bunches and stuck them on the bunch I bought.)

When I got home, I peeled off the stickers and placed them on an index card. That way, it would be easier to have the stickers at hand when I wrote this entry. Naturally, the card disappeared as soon as I stuck it in my backpack, and has been disappearing and reappearing on a random basis over the past few weeks.

I found the card again within the past hour, so I decided that I should write this entry now before the card decides to vanish once again. The bunch of bananas I bought had three stickers with messages on them. Here they are, for your amusement:

"100% Perfection."
(Well, at least until they start turning a little too brown.)

"Brain Fuel."
"PSSST! I'm Full of Vitamins."

And as I have done previously, the messages are capitalized just as they are on the stickers.

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Birthday Fortune From The Orange Owl

2011-09-27T20:40:00.005-04:00

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The last time I went to Hooters (which, I should point out, was the first time I had ever eaten there), I discovered that the pre-moistened napkins they have at the tables are printed with what I call fortune-ish phrases on one side. I told myself that the next time I dined at Hooters, I would need to keep an eye out for napkins that had different phrases.

Today, I went by my local Hooters again. I had signed up for their email club, and a few days ago, I received a birthday present -- a plate of 10 free wings. I had to use the coupon within a week of my birthday, so I decided to use it today.

Once I found a table, and had settled down, I took a look at the napkins in the rack. There were a couple of packets with the same phrases that I saw last time, but I also found three new fortune-ish packets in the assortment. Here's what they said:

"58.3% of statistics are made up."
"Bartender: Pharmacist with limited inventory."
"Insomnia is nothing to lose sleep over."

Interesting birthday present, to say the least.

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A Cookie-Less Fortune

2011-08-27T16:17:00.002-04:00

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I found this fortune entirely by accident. I was in the library today, and I happened to be looking down when I noticed a tiny slip of paper on the floor. It was the fortune from a fortune cookie -- and there wasn't a cookie anywhere to be seen.

At first, I thought it might have been one of mine. I usually stick fortunes in the neck pouch that I use to keep my TARC pass handy. They usually stay there until I write about them here. But after a quick look at said neck pouch, it didn't look as though anything had fallen out of it. And I strongly suspect that more than just a single fortune would have fallen out if anything did.

I logged on here, and I did a quick scroll through some of my most recent entries. The fortune did not appear in any of those entries, so I am fairly safe in stating that I had not written about it -- until now, that is. Here's my unexpected discovery:

"Be cautious while walking in darkness alone."

You know, that's pretty good advice most of the time. Of course, if you're Batman, or a ninja, this probably doesn't apply to you.

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What's Really Being Stamped Out?

2011-08-18T20:26:00.003-04:00

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Back in January, I wrote about a number of other platforms that just as easily convey the brief sentiments you find in the fortune of a fortune cookie. One of those is the button.

I've picked up dozens of buttons at SF conventions over the years. It's not that hard to do, especially when the dealer prices them like "$2 each, 3 for $5" or some similar discount for multiples. At that point, it becomes a question of how many do I really want to get this time, and once I have a quantity, which ones do I really want?

I was looking through the bag where I keep my buttons, and I decided to wear this one today. It appeals to my admittedly snarky sense of humor:

"HELP STAMP OUT UNICORNS -- walk a virgin home tonight."

The cynical side of me is saying, "Yeah, what are you really wanting to stamp out, pal?" The more or less non-cynical side of me is pretty much in agreement.

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The Wisdom Of An Owl

2011-07-27T16:33:00.003-04:00

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At the moment, I'm sitting in Hooters. Normally, I would not have thought that this particular place would be a source of research material for this particular blog. But as I was waiting for another plate of wings (I ordered the all-you-can-eat wings), I noticed the pre-moistened napkins at my table. (They're in the same rack that holds the menus and the roll of paper towels.)

On one side of the package is the Hooters logo. On the other side was a short phrase of the type that I usually tag as "fortune-ish." I found two different ones at my table this time:

"Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?"
"Indecision is the key to flexibility."

I'll have to keep my eyes open the next time I go to Hooters.

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Here A Double . . .

2011-06-30T14:54:00.004-04:00

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As I said yesterday, I mentioned that I had pulled another fortune cookie from the big bag. I also mentioned that I didn't have the fortune with me when I was writing the entry. Well, today I remembered to bring the fortune with me. And I quickly noticed that I had another duplicate on my hands:

"You have a deep interest in all that is artistic."

And once again, everything was duplicated. The lucky numbers on both fortunes were as follows:

07 11 12 15 20 24

And on the back of both fortunes was the same Chinese word/phrase. It was "baseball," which according to this fortune, is "bong cho" in Chinese.

You know, I really hope that I am not going to be running into only a dozen or so fortunes over and over again throughout the bag. For one thing, it would kind of ruin the whole purpose of my buying the bag of fortune cookies. For another, it would get a little boring after a while. And for yet another, after a while, it's going to get a little difficult thinking up new ways to write about the same fortune yet again.

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Totally Random

2011-06-29T20:09:00.003-04:00

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I made what I thought was a rather interesting and random discovery last night. It happened because I realized I hadn't posted anything for a couple of weeks. (Unfortunately, I don't have the fortune with me, so that entry will have to wait for tomorrow.) When I pulled a fortune cookie out of the big bag, I noticed that it might have been a little stale.

I decided that I would see if I could do something to make the cookie a little crisper. My first thought was to place it in the microwave for about 10 seconds. And that is what I did.

The results were not quite what I expected. The zapping did not make the cookie crisper. As a matter of fact, it had the opposite effect -- it became softer. In fact, the cookie became rather pliable, to the point where I could unfold it to remove the fortune.

Now, here is something you might not have known. The fortune cookie is circular. The fortune is placed in the center of the cookie, then it is folded in thirds, parallel to the long edge of the fortune. The cookie is then folded more or less in half to get the familiar shape.

I'll have to try another tactic to make the cookies crisp again. I'll keep you posted.

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Just Long Isn't Enough

2011-06-04T20:17:00.003-04:00

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I just realized that it has been a month since I last posted something. Well, I can say that I have been busy. In any event, it looks like it's time to go back to the big bag of fortune cookies. And this time, the fortune says:

"Long life is in store for you."

Just as long as I will be able to properly enjoy that long life; that's all I'm asking.

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Missing The Mark With THAT Fortune

2011-05-02T18:42:00.003-04:00

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Tra-la, it's May, the rainy month of May . . . well, that's what it's looking like at the moment. Last month was Louisville's wettest April on record, and it looks like May is trying to continue that theme.

I pulled a fortune cookie out of the big bag yesterday. Even though I had the fortune with me, I forgot to write about it. Well, time to correct that. The fortune from this cookie read as follows:

"You have a friendly heart and are well admired."

Okay, every once in a while, you get a fortune that leaves you wondering, because you know it can't be talking about you.

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I'm Beginning To Sense A Pattern Here

2011-04-30T21:17:00.002-04:00

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A few days ago, I reached into the bag of fortune cookies, and once again, I encountered a fortune for the second time:

"All your hard work will soon pay off."

And as on the previous occasions, this one was a true duplicate. Here are the lucky numbers from both fortunes:

02 06 09 19 26 33

The Chinese word on the back of both was "Gift/Present," which translates (at least on the fortune) as "li woo."

Now I'm beginning to wonder. Just how many different fortunes does this bag contain? And how many duplicates will I be running into while I go through this bag of fortune cookies?

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That's A Little Reassuring

2011-04-26T18:37:00.002-04:00

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Today, we return to the bag of fortune cookies from GFS. Here's what the latest fortune had to say:

"You should be able to make money and hold on to it."

Not if the Democrats have anything to say about it. The holding on part, anyway. They seem to think that we exist solely to fuel their fantasies of redistributing wealth.

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Interested In Art, Yes

2011-04-21T19:02:00.002-04:00

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Earlier today, I decided that it was time to reach into the big bag of fortune cookies once again. Instead of just grabbing a cookie from the top of the bag, I reached down a little for today's fortune:

"You have a deep interest in all that is artistic."

That rather depends on how you define art. A crucifix in a bottle of urine isn't art; it's just someone's calculated attempt to see if he can get some people really, really irritated. And a really piss-poor one at that.

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It Did Wish More Than Once

2011-04-06T20:05:00.003-04:00

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I dipped into the big bag of fortune cookies earlier today, and I pulled out another fortune that I previously encountered:

"If you wish to, you will have an opportunity."

And as was the case with the last duplicate I pulled out of this bag, it was a true duplicate. The lucky numbers on both fortunes were:

20 21 32 33 45 51

And this time, the mini-lesson in Chinese was a phrase. The phrase was "Have you any question?", which was transliterated as "NI you wenti ma?"

As for the fortune, yes, I would really wish to have an opportunity. Please have it shipped to my condo by UPS. Thank you very much.

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Greetings Of The Day

2011-04-01T20:46:00.003-04:00

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As I've mentioned before, today is not the best time for a new entry here. With half the Internet trying to pull some kind of joke on the other half, April Fools Day is never a good time to mention whatever fortune I most recently found in a fortune cookie.

If I found something completely outrageous, or incredibly funny, no one is going to believe me. One look at the date stamp, and the response is, "Yeah, right."

On the other hand, something completely run-of-the-mill is likely to be met with disbelief as well. Again, a quick glance at the date stamp (assuming that you're not fully aware of what the day is) earns a response of, "Is that the best you could do?"

So, I've decided that the best approach is to acknowledge the day, and state that I'm taking the day off from engaging in fortune cookie philosophy. Other than not posting an entry. But I do feel the urge to post something.

And since I conclude my April Fools Day entries with an observation or bit of advice on the day, here's my thought this year:

April Fools Day is the one day of the year when everyone seems to think they are Allen Funt.

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Get Back To Where You Once Belong

2011-03-30T19:16:00.008-04:00

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As I've mentioned in the last couple of entries, I had been cleaning my condo in a semi-mad frenzied rush. I've been taking a break since last Thursday, mainly because I was just a little burned out, and I was needing something to restore what I laughingly refer to as my sanity.

Early this morning, I walked by the big bag of fortune cookies, and decided that it was time to pull out another cookie. I saw one on top that was partially broken, and further decided that it would be the cookie of the day. (For some reason, these cookies are not individually wrapped. I suspect that by the time I reach the end of the bag, I will be faced with a layer of fortune cookie fragments.)

Here is the fortune from today's cookie:

"You should be able to undertake and complete anything."

Hmmmm . . . I think the cookie is telling me that it's time to get back to cleaning.

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A Baci For Destressing

2011-03-25T20:31:00.002-04:00

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In my last entry, I mentioned that I was in the process of cleaning my condo. I still haven't completed it, but at least the main reason for doing so is out of the way.

I had spent most of the last couple of weeks trying to clean the place. I won't go into details, but I was doing this because someone was paying a visit that lasted, at most, 15 minutes. I also spent a good portion of the last couple of weeks stressing out over the visit, for two reasons. First, there was the reason for the visit, which, as I said, I would rather not mention the sordid details. Second, I'm not really not that good a housekeeper. In fact, my housecleaning skills do not come up to the high exacting standards of Oscar Madison.

Yesterday was the visit, and I was cleaning up until about 10 minutes before my visitor arrived. At that point, I realized that I had completed as much as was going to be completed. And it was time to face the visit itself.

As you perhaps may have already guessed, I don't entertain. In fact, I tend to stress out when someone else is in my condo, which probably explains my somewhat . . . relaxed attitude toward housecleaning. If I remember correctly, the last person in my condo (other than me, of course) was a plumber sometime last year.

By the time my visitor left, I was in need of something to destress me. I recently read that two good ways of dealing with stress were sex and chocolate. Well, one of those is not a viable alternative, and it would probably take more chocolate than I could comfortably consume to ameliorate my stress levels at the time. Fortunately, simply getting out of the condo for a few hours handled things quite nicely.

While I was doing the cleaning, I discovered a box of Baci that had gotten buried under some other stuff. The box (and they) were slightly smashed, but were otherwise all right.

Unwrapping these Baci proved to be a slight challenge. After all, I didn't want to damage the love notes underneath the foil. And I was rewarded for my efforts with these notes:

"Doubt thou the stars are fire . . . But never doubt my love." -- William Shakespeare
"The woman does not exist of whose beauty all men shall agree upon." -- G. Leopardi

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I Really Hope So

2011-03-19T14:15:00.003-04:00

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I pulled another fortune cookie out of the bag today. Here's the fortune:

"All your hard work will soon pay off."

At the moment, I'm in the process of cleaning my condo. It will be nice when the payoff does finally arrive.

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I Hope It Wishes More Than Once

2011-03-11T20:34:00.002-05:00

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I felt in the mood, so I pulled another fortune cookie from the bag. Here's today's fortune:

"If you wish to, you will have an opportunity."

Okay, I'm wishing. Among other things, I'm wishing that I will recognize said opportunity once it finally appears.

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I Hope She's Cute, Too

2011-03-10T18:53:00.004-05:00

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Time once again to reach into the mailbag . . . uh, make that the big bag of fortune cookies. Here's the fortune that was in today's cookie:

"Your future brings cheerful company and merry times."

I'm hoping that said cheerful company is female, and the merry times include the sharing of fortunes from fortune cookies.

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Feeling Like Karen Carpenter

2011-03-03T18:30:00.003-05:00

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I reached into the big bag with just the slightest amount of trepidation. I couldn't get the same fortune three times in a row, could I? What were the odds on that happening? (Yeah, I know the quote: "Never tell me the odds!")

As it turns out, there was an entirely different fortune in this cookie:

"Soon you will be sitting on the top of the world."

Okay. And will I be looking down on creation while I'm on the top of the world?

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Not A Sad Song, Either

2011-03-02T19:00:00.002-05:00

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When I came up with the idea of Project GFS1, I figured that I would encounter a duplicate fortune. The bag did start with 160 fortune cookies; it would be reasonable to assume that there are at least a couple of duplicates in the bag.

I just didn't think it would happen this quickly.

Here's the fortune from the cookie I pulled out of the bag yesterday:

"Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances."

Not only is the fortune the same; this time, it is an exact duplicate. The lucky numbers are the same:

06 13 17 25 43 46

And you might notice that some fortune cookies teach you a word or two of Chinese. The fortunes in these cookies do, and the word was the same in both instances. The word was "chopstick," which they transliterated as quite ze.

Time to start wondering how soon it will be before I encounter another duplicate. Or is encountering a triplicate too far-fetched to contemplate?

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Apparently Not A Warm Puppy

2011-02-22T19:24:00.003-05:00

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Today seemed like a good day to pull a fortune cookie out of the bag. So that's what I did, and here's the fortune:

"Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances."

Sounds to me like that old song lyric, "If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with." Or at least a variation on that theme.

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Introducing Project GFS1

2011-02-19T20:18:00.005-05:00

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Remember last entry, when I said that I already had something to replace the now-depleted bag of fortune cookies that my friend Linda gave me? I've been meaning to write about this for a couple of weeks now, and I finally got my butt in gear today.

This little project actually started February 3 -- Chinese New Year. When I went to Jefferson Mall, I also made a swing by the nearby GFS. Now, if you're unfamiliar with Gordon Food Service, I've occasionally described it as a great place to go if you're planning a party. Need to buy ketchup, chocolate syrup, soy sauce, or barbecue sauce by the gallon? GFS is the place to go. Planning a room party at your favorite sf convention, and need to feed a few hundred of your closest friends (some of whom you have just met for the first time)? You can find what you need at GFS. Trust me.

In a couple of previous visits to GFS, I noticed that they carried fortune cookies -- in bulk. More than likely, this is what your local Chinese restaurant buys when they get fortune cookies. After one visit, I thought that this might be an interesting source of material for this blog. If I haven't been in the mood for Chinese for a while, I can still write an entry. All I have to do is pull out a fortune cookie, and voila, instant entry.

As you probably have already guessed, I purchased a whole bunch of fortune cookies that day. "A whole bunch" in this case was a bag containing 160 fortune cookies. This bag should last me quite a while. Even if I didn't use any other source material for this blog, I could have enough entries for most of the year. (And I do plan to have using other sources. sooner or later, I'm going to have a craving for Chinese.)

As I said, it's about time I started using these cookies for the reason I bought them. Here is the first of many, many fortunes from that bag:

"You should be able to undertake and complete anything."

Hmmmm, kind of appropriate for a first entry, now that I think about it.

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Linda Collection 8

2011-02-07T18:14:00.002-05:00

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Well, I have finally reached the last of the fortune cookies that my friend Linda gave me. So unless Linda shows up at a club meeting with another big bag of fortune cookies, this will probably be the last Linda Collection.

Looking back, I see that I made the cookies last over two years. More importantly, these last cookies didn't taste stale, so it seems I didn't have to worry all much on that account. And I have decided on a replacement for the Linda Collection entries (more on that in a future entry). So for now, I present the fortunes (with comments by me in parentheses):

"You are a bundle of energy, always on the go."
(Well, most of the time, anyway.)

"You have a potential urge and the ability for accomplishment."
(Sounds promising.)

"Your dearest dream is coming true."
(You mean the identical triplet majorettes?)

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Happenstance, Coincidence, . . . ?

2011-02-06T15:58:00.003-05:00

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"Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life."

This makes the second time that I have discovered the same fortune twice in a batch of fortune cookies that I have bought. Granted, this isn't going to happen to most people. Most people probably aren't going to be picking up fortune cookies in bulk. Or if they are, the odds are more likely that they will probably be doing it for a party, and that they will not be opening all the cookies by themselves.

The last time this happened to me, I decided that the odds on something like this happening were along the lines of "astronomical." I also said that getting more specific would take someone like Charlie Eppes of the TV series Numb3rs to do the actual math.

Obviously, I need to redefine my idea of astronomical odds.

At the moment, I'm thinking of Ian Fleming's Goldfinger, and a line from the titular character: "Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence, three times is enemy action." I've seen a number of variations on this theme; one that might fit this instance more accurately is, "Once is an event, twice is circumstance, three times is a pattern."

It didn't surprise me the first time I encountered a fortune for the second time. I suspect that this sort of thing happens more often than people realize. I'm just noticing it because I hang on to my fortunes. Getting two at the same time was surprising -- and having it happen twice was even more so. Now, I find myself wondering how long it might be before it happens again.

I suppose the answer to that question depends on how often I buy a batch of fortunes.

Like the other duplicates, this pair had different sets of lucky numbers. But this particular company printed two sets of numbers on the back. One was "Daily Numbers," which was numbers for Pick 3, while the other set was the usual set of six numbers. Here's the numbers listed on one fortune:

Daily Numbers: 8 5 5
Lotto: 25 18 38 32 23 37

And here are the numbers from the other fortune:

Daily Numbers: 0 3 4
Lotto: 21 31 08 05 46 12

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Eh, Happy New Year, Doc!

2011-02-03T20:09:00.005-05:00

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If the title doesn't make any particular sense, imagine Bugs Bunny saying it.

Today is the Chinese New Year. Specifically, it is the Year Of The Rabbit, which is why I chose a title referencing that Oscar-winning rabbit.

Last year, I discovered that ordering takeout from a Chinese restaurant might not be the best idea. Oh well, at least it didn't fall on Super Bowl Sunday. That would probably be chaos squared, at the very least.

I went by Jefferson Mall today. After visiting the food court, I concluded that mall food court Chinese restaurants probably don't deal with the same sort of insanity on the Chinese New Year. The traffic at Max Orient -- indeed, the entire food court -- seemed to be fairly normal. Of course, when I made my stop, it was just after the usual lunch hour, and it was way too early for the dinner crowd.

I didn't have any fortunes on me, and I thought I should post some sort of entry today. So, as you may have guessed, I made a swing by Max Orient just to pick up some fortune cookies. I picked up my usual half dozen for $1, and I nibbled on the cookies after catching TARC.

Here are the fortunes, with some editorial comment by me (in parentheses):

"At 20 years of age the will reigns; at 30 the wit; at 40 the judgment."
(Okay, what happens after that?)

"Depart not from the path which fate has you assigned."
(How do you know that fate has assigned you a particular path until and unless you try to depart from it?)

"The best prophet of the future is the past."
(Those who do not learn from history, etc., etc.)

"When winter comes heaven will rain success on you."
(So far this winter, all heaven has rained on Louisville has been rain -- and snow.)

"Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life."
"Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life."
(Yeah, I got two cookies with the same fortune. I'm not sure if this means I should pay more attention to this one or not. I'll probably be writing another entry on this fortune later.)

And even though the Year Of The Pig was four years ago, I think it appropriate to end with the words of Bugs's friend Porky Pig:

"Th-Th-Th-That's All, Folks!"

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Other Fortune Platforms

2011-01-31T18:03:00.003-05:00

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A little over a month ago, I posted my first working definition of "Fortune Cookie Philosophy." I have been giving the matter some additional thought since then, and I thought it might be a good idea to write about those musings while they are still more or less on my mind.

Of course, there are similar platforms for conveying the same ideas that you can find in the fortune of a fortune cookie. The first that comes to mind is the bumper sticker. It's even the same basic shape as the fortune. You probably don't find anything particularly profound on a bumper sticker, though. It's probably not a good idea, come to think of it; you probably don't want to be distracting the driver behind you too much at 70 MPH. Which means that you're more likely to find something along the lines of "My Labrador retriever is smarter than your honor student" than "What's hidden in an empty box?"

A platform more likely to mirror the fortune cookie is the button. I have amassed quite the collection of buttons over the years. I acquired most of them at the dealers rooms of many science fiction conventions, and as you might suspect, those do reflect the genre. Like this one from the early 1990s: "Mr. Data, did you just say, 'Oh, Boy!'?" In my mind, though, the passage of a few years would provide a funnier version: "Captain Archer, why did you just say, 'Oh, Boy!'?"

I think one of the best buttons I have seen was one that my brother picked up in England many years ago. It said, "If God had not wanted us to make dirty jokes, He would have come up with a more dignified means of reproducing the species." I love the understated humor, and I have found that it's impossible to read that line aloud in anything other than a British accent.

Finally, we have the T-shirt. Now, there is one big difference with this platform for espousing fortune cookie philosophy. You have just a little more room to express yourself, which can lead to something similar to the T-shirt I saw that begins, "Stop Reading This!" From that beginning, it goes on in smaller letters saying things like, "Seriously, I mean it. Stop reading now. Why are you still reading this?"

Of course, you can still use it to prove that brevity is indeed the soul of wit. For instance, there is the T-shirt that simply says, "Sorry Yet?" The O in sorry is the logo of Obama's 2008 campaign. (For the record, I was sorry as soon as the election results were announced. But if you think things are really screwed up, don't blame me -- I voted for John McCain.)

I have mentioned other platforms from time to time, in the entries with the "fortune-ish" tag. But these are three I haven't mentioned before, and thought were worth mentioning.

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Linda Collection 7

2011-01-29T15:18:00.001-05:00

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You might have noticed that I have been somewhat conspicuous in my absence this month. There's a simple explanation, really. I haven't been in the mood for Chinese food recently. And if I don't get Chinese anywhere, that also means that I don't have any fortune cookies.

Well, I still have a few fortune cookies in that bag my friend Linda gave me. So, it's as good a reason as any to post another Linda Collection entry. (Unfortunately, I think I have only one more entry to go before I use up all of the fortune cookies.)

This time, I grabbed two cookies from the bag. Here's what the fortunes said:

"Your life becomes more and more of an adventure!"
"Your whole family are well."

All right, the second fortune sounds more than a little vague. And I'm wondering just what sort of adventure my life is going to become.

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All Right, Now WHY?

2010-12-31T19:30:00.003-05:00

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I was Kroger again earlier, and once again, I stopped by the bananas in the produce section. The bananas were somewhat depleted, but I noticed that among the bunches still on the display, there was more of a variety in the stickers than there were on my last visit.

There was one sticker in particular that caught my attention. It caught my attention primarily because it doesn't seem to make any sense:

"Place Sticker on Forehead. Smile."

(Please note that as usual, I am capitalizing it just as I saw it on the sticker.)

Now, could someone please tell me why anyone would want to put this sticker on their forehead? If I were to see someone sporting one of these stickers on their forehead, I would be wondering if they had been using the bananas to make a few too many banana daiquiris. Anyone have an explanation for this? Comments would be welcome.

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Stuck For An Entry

2010-12-28T19:06:00.005-05:00

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I was doing a little grocery shopping earlier this evening. As I walked through the produce section, I took a look at the bananas. I was paying particular attention to the bananas.

The last time I wrote about banana stickers (or more precise, what was printed on them), I noticed an abundance of stickers that simply said "Wii," which I suspect is some kind of promotion with that video game system. (Possibly the Donkey Kong game specifically?) That seemed to be the case this time as well, although I also noticed a number of stickers bearing artwork that had been designed by consumers as part of a contest.

I did find one banana bearing a fortune-ish sticker. I didn't need any bananas today, so I simply took the sticker, so I would remember what it said:

"I ♥ Lunch Boxes."

Not a bad way of reminding people that bananas are a pretty decent choice for lunch if you're deciding to brown-bag it.

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A Working Definition . . . Maybe

2010-12-25T19:19:00.001-05:00

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Ever since I started The Janus Files 2, I have been trying to think of a good (and reasonably brief) definition of the topic of this blog, which is, of course, "Fortune Cookie Philosophy." I mean, the phrase is probably one of those things that I hope makes the light bulb in your head turn on immediately. You'll see the phrase and think, Okay, I get it! On the other hand, if I were to press you for a definition, It might not be so easy to verbalize.

Have I confused everyone yet? I sincerely hope not.

In any event, I have been trying to put together a definition that makes sense (or something resembling it) to me. And I think I may have something that more or less fits my view of the term. So, here we go:

Fortune Cookie Philosophy is a collection of brief words of wisdom, quotes, or advice that can easily fit on the slip of paper tucked into a fortune cookie, or similar small space.

Hmmm . . . that is coming close to my ideal definition. I think it's the best I can do at the moment. Let's call it a work in progress.

I hope all of you are having a very Merry Christmas. Or as some of my Jewish friends would say, Happy Chinese Dinner And A Movie Day.

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Linda Collection 6

2010-12-20T20:07:00.002-05:00

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I noticed a few days ago that it had been some time since I posted an entry concerning that big bag of fortune cookies that my friend Linda gave me many months ago. I also realized that sooner or later, those cookies are probably going to go stale, so it might be a good idea to go ahead and finish the cookies before that happens.

This time, I pulled out five fortune cookies from the bag. No particular rhyme or reason to my selection, although I did select one cookie that was crushed. In any case, here's what the fortunes said:

"A cheerful letter or message is on its way to you."*
"Accept the next proposition you hear."
"Happiness always accompanies with you."
"If you have a job without aggravations, you don't have a job."**
"You are kind-hearted and hospitable, cheerful and well-liked."

*This time of year, that will probably be a Christmas card.
**There are aggravations, and then there are aggravations. When people seem hellbent on causing as many as possible, I can do without them, job or not.

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Fortune Crushing

2010-12-01T20:05:00.004-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #146 . . . OPEN:

Recently, I stopped by Jefferson Mall. It had been some time since I had picked up some fortune cookies at Max Orient, so I decided to make a swing by the food court and get a half dozen cookies.

I put the bag of cookies in my backpack, and then quickly forgot about them. I was planning to crack them open and write about the fortunes either that day or the following day, but they were shoved . . . well, not quite to the bottom of the pack, but close enough.

I remembered that the cookies were still in my backpack today. Unearthing the bag didn't require quite the skills of Indiana Jones, but it came close.

After spending about two weeks in my backpack, I didn't have to crack open the cookies. They were more than cracked open at this point. In point of fact, they wee well on their way to being crushed. Fortunately, they hadn't been pulverized to dust just yet.

The crushed state of the cookies did make things easier when it came to extracting the fortune. All I had to do was open the wrapper -- very carefully, I might add -- and pull the fortune out from the crumbs. I then dumped the crumbs into my hand, and from there they went into my mouth.

Once I had disposed of the cookies, I had these fortunes:

"A man can fail many times, but he isn't a failure until he gives up."*
"All things come to him who goes after them."
"Love is as necessary to human beings as food and shelter."**
"Soothing your body are the name of the game today."
"The path is getting easier from here on out. Luck is helping."
"Time heals all wounds."***

*I keep seeing running into a variant of this whenever I run out of time on Jewel Quest 3.
**If that's the case, I'm practically anorexic.
***I know I've seen this quote before, but who said it?

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Delay Not?

2010-11-09T19:08:00.005-05:00

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I had lunch at #1 Asian Buffet yesterday. I was at Mid-City Mall at the time, and I was just in the mood for something substantial.

Now, the last time I ate there, I mentioned that I felt uncomfortably overstuffed when I left. I didn't know why, because I didn't think I had eaten more than I usually do. This time was different. I was feeling a little stuffed when I was finished, but I didn't have the feeling that I had last time. The feeling that I described as having a large lump of spent uranium just lying there in my stomach.

I ended up with two fortune cookies this time. I didn't open them until this afternoon, which gives the first fortune just a little bit of irony:

"Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone."

Okay, that sounds like a not-so-subtle reminder to write the entry as soon after getting the fortune cookie as possible. And then, there was the other fortune:

"What's hidden in an empty box?"

Now, that sounds like something that The Riddler would send Batman in advance of his next crime.

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A Fitting Fortune From A Far-Off Friend

2010-10-29T22:06:00.004-04:00

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I have mentioned once or twice that some of my friends know about my penchant for collecting fortunes. And occasionally, they will remember to save their fortunes for me.

Last week, though, I received a fortune from an entirely unexpected friendly source. Said fortune arrived with a regular mailing from John Hertz.

Like me, John Hertz is a science fiction fan. He is a wonderful gentleman, and the recipient of one of SF fandom's highest honors, the Big Heart Award. (And trust me, it is well deserved.) Since he lives in Los Angeles, we usually run into each other at the occasional convention. Most of our communication is conducted through the mail.

One of Mr. Hertz's (many) fannish activities is Vanamonde, his contribution to the amateur press association APA-L. Every so often, I will receive an envelope containing several past installments of Vanamonde; usually 10 or so. I always find them interesting, if sometimes a little tricky follow. I once told Mr. Hertz that reading Vanamonde was like listening to a phone conversation where you couldn't hear the other side. (I presume that the other half of those conversations are taking place in the pages of other contributors' apa-zines.)

As I said, last week I received the latest bundle of Vanamonde. "Latest" is relatively speaking; the issues are from several months previous, and I suspect are from what are left over after APA-L is collated. As I was reading issue #845, I noticed at the bottom what could only be the fortune from a fortune cookie. It was in a different typeface than what he normally uses, and there were a series of numbers that looked like "lucky numbers" under the line:

"Listen to friends with an ear to the future."

Mr. Hertz commented that he planned to seek out such friends at Anticipation, 2009's World Science Fiction Convention.

Definitely one of those occasions when someone got precisely the right fortune.

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That's Something New

2010-10-28T20:51:00.002-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0143 . . . OPEN:

Late this morning, there was something that I absolutely had to get some Chinese takeout today. I think it was my stomach rumbling, and the fact that at the time, China 1 was the closest place to get something to stop the rumbling.

When I walked through the door, I was more than a little startled. There was a white guy sitting at the cash register. That isn't something you normally see at a Chinese restaurant. Judging from some of the difficulties he had, I got the impression that he hadn't been working there long.

I ordered the shrimp with garlic sauce lunch special -- completely forgetting that this was what I ordered the last time. (I do like to order different things, just to see if there is something I haven't tried yet.) I must have remembered ordering that in the past at least subconsciously, because I asked if it had bell pepper, and asked them to hold it when they said yes.

China 1 was a side trip on my way to the library. There were a couple of benches outside the building, and I settled there to eat my lunch. (The library has this thing about people bringing food and drink into the library.)

When I ordered, I thought I also told them to make it less spicy. Either the cook has a different idea of what constitutes "less spicy" than I do, or they didn't catch that part of my order. The garlic sauce was just a little spicier than I thought it would be. It wasn't too bad by the time I stirred the remaining sauce into the fried rice.

And of course, capping my lunch was the fortune cookie. Here's the fortune:

"If you care enough for a result, you will most certainly attain it."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0143 . . . CLOSE

That's Potassium With A "K"

2010-10-27T19:47:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0142 . . . OPEN:

I bought a bunch of bananas earlier today. And as I looked over the bunches, I was also taking a good look at the stickers.

I was thinking of getting some bananas a few days ago. But when I started looking at what was available, the only stickers besides those bearing the Chiquita logo simply said, "Wii." I am guessing that Chiquita is doing some sort of promotion in conjunction with the Wii game system, but I didn't see anything to confirm my guess.

Today, however, was a different story. Oh, I saw plenty of the "Wii" stickers, but I also saw a variety of the fortune-ish stickers that I saw about a month ago. I saw one bunch that had a couple of different stickers, so of course that was the bunch I selected. Here's what the stickers said:

"The Food that Fights for You!"
"Yum, Yum, Potassi-yum!"

These are capitalized exactly as they were on the stickers. I'm not sure why some words were capitalized the way they were. And I like the second sticker's way of emphasizing bananas as a good source of potassium.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0142 . . . CLOSE

Let's Go Bananas!

2010-09-13T19:42:00.002-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0141 . . . OPEN:

If you like bananas, you are probably more than a little familiar with those blue oval stickers appearing on bunches of Chiquita bananas. Not on every banana in the bunch, but at least one banana in every bunch is adorned with the blue sticker bearing the Chiquita logo.

Well, not long ago, I was at the supermarket, and I decided to pick up some bananas. I was looking for a small bunch -- no more than three or four -- because if I buy any more than that at any one time, some of them are likely to go bad before I eat them.

As I made my selection, I glanced at the sticker, and something caught my eye. The sticker had the Chiquita brand name, but it didn't have the lady banana wearing the hat full of fruit. Instead, there was a brief message on the sticker.

I took a closer look at the rest of the display, and I noticed that the stickers were (if you'll pardon the pun) a mixed bunch. Some of them did carry the picture logo, while others contained brief messages. (Considering the size of the sticker, they had to be brief.) And most of the messages seemed to be something close to what you might find in a fortune cookie.

I've picked up a few different stickers, but most of them seem to have gone into hiding. At the moment, all I can find is this one:

"Peel Me -- I'm Fat Free!"

I'm sure the others will resurface sooner or later. And, I suppose I can always go back to Kroger to buy more bananas.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0141 . . . CLOSE

Running Out Of Kiss Puns

2010-09-12T17:55:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0140 . . . OPEN:

I opened up the other box of Baci yesterday. I was waiting on a couple of different occasions for the bus to arrive, and decided that there was plenty of time to savor a Baci. (Actually, I think the correct term for the singular is "Bacio," but since I don't know Italian, I don't know for certain.)

As the title of this entry suggest, I am running out of cute phrases to use as titles, and substituting "baci" (or "bacio") for "kiss." Which means that the next time I have an entry about the messages I find in Baci, I'm going to have to really think of a good title.

Well, enough of the preamble. Here are the messages I found in this pair of Baci:

"Friendship is Love without his wings!" -- G. Byron (More from Lord Byron?)
"One little kiss can contain the grandest passion." -- Anonymous

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0140 . . . CLOSE

A Lingering Baci

2010-09-07T14:27:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0139 . . . OPEN:

Not too long ago, I picked a couple of boxes of Baci at World Market. I didn't eat them right away. As a matter of fact, it took a few days before I opened the first box, because I wanted the chance to savor the Baci as much as possible. These are not chocolates to scarf down like you would a bag of potato chips.

One day last week, I finally found just the right moment to open that first box. And yes, I did savor the chocolates as much as I possibly could. And I was intrigued by the love notes I found wrapped around this pair of Baci:

"There is no instince like that of the heart." -- G. Byron (I suspect this refers to George Gordon, Lord Byron.)
"How you give is more important thanwhat you give." -- P. Corneille

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0139 . . . CLOSE

More Than One Reason

2010-08-19T19:42:00.006-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0138 . . . OPEN:

Yesterday, I stopped by China 1 to pick up a slightly late lunch. As it turned out, that was a smart idea, because "crazy" does not begin to describe things at work last evening.

It was still early enough to order a lunch special, and I ordered shrimp with garlic sauce. I did ask them to tone down the spiciness in the sauce. I didn't realize that it contained bell pepper, or I would have asked them to hold that as well.

One of the reasons I stopped by China 1 is that they have extra packets of soy sauce, hot mustard, and duck sauce available for the customers, and I picked up several of the first two. (The reasons for that will be covered in a future entry.)

After getting my food, I caught the TARC, and rode it to Shelbyville Road Plaza. I was making a stop by Borders before I went to work, and before going there, I found a bench, and I sat down to eat.

As I mentioned, I discovered the hard way that China 1 puts bell pepper in their shrimp with garlic sauce. Fortunately, the chunks were large enough that I was able to quickly spot them, and toss them at the base of a tree near where I was setting. (Hey, it is biodegradable, right?) And they made the garlic sauce just a little milder than I thought they would. Well, I suppose that last bit is my fault; I did ask for the mild version, after all. I'll have to ask for the medium version next time I order it.

Even though the sauce was on the mild side, the food was delicious, with plenty of decent-sized shrimp (I suppose "medium" is the official name). It also came with plenty of mushrooms, water chestnuts, baby corn, and other vegetables. And the sauce blended together quite nicely with the fried rice. Oh, and China 1 put the food in a reusable microwave dish. Not completely certain if I would want to try to bring anything from home to work, though; at least not when I'm on bike.

Of course, the meal included a fortune cookie, and the fortune inside read as follows:

"Serious trouble will bypass you."

This is one of those fortunes that I sincerely hope will hold true.

As I said, it was a good thing I had a chance to eat before going to work. It was one of those nights when anything and everything crazy seemed to happen. It's not a good thing when it feels like rush hour for more than four hours.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0138 . . . CLOSE

Random Fortune At Work

2010-08-17T15:54:00.002-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0137 . . . OPEN:

Every once in a while, I'll notice that a customer has an old fortune from a fortune cookie in his/her wallet -- usually right in front of their driver's license. If I have the chance, I'll ask what the fortune says, and the customer will either show me the fortune, or read it to me.

I had one of those moments a couple of nights ago. A customer was getting the money for her purchase out of her wallet, and I spotted the fortune. As always, I was curious, and I said, "Just out of curiosity, what does the fortune say?" She looked at the fortune for a moment, then told me:

"A day of worry is more exhausting than a week of work."

I'm not quite certain why she found the fortune to be that much of a keeper. Then again, every fortune speaks to each person differently.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0137 . . . CLOSE

Fortune The 13th

2010-08-14T14:28:00.002-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0136 . . . OPEN:

Last night at work, I got takeout from Oriental House. It wasn't planned; it was just one of those days when I had a number of things to do before going to work, and it turned out to be the best option. I suppose the more superstitious would say that it was a case of Friday The 13th rearing its ugly head.

Fortunately, there was enough overlap between my arrival and Hale's departure that I was able to take a couple of minutes, walk over to Oriental House, and place my order. A little while later, they brought my food over.

I wasn't particularly adventurous last night, and I ordered the lemon chicken lunch special. It was interesting to note that the lemon sauce came in a separate container this time, instead of being part of the dish as I have previously received it.

The food was great -- even if I had to eat it a bite or two at a time. And here's what the fortune said:

"Be mischievous and you will not be lonesome."

For once, a fortune that appeals to my own sense of humor.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0136 . . . CLOSE

Better Than Half A Fortune

2010-08-09T13:16:00.005-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0135 . . . OPEN:

As I have mentioned once or twice, I occasionally find the random fortune at work. I'm guessing that they probably come from Oriental House. At least, that's their most likely origin.

While I was cleaning last night, I found a fortune at the lottery station. It didn't surprise me too much. I merely assumed that whoever left it there filled out a Powerball or Mega Millions playslip using the "lucky numbers" on the reverse of the fortune. What did surprise me just a little was that, before discarding the fortune, the person had ripped it in half. I have no idea why he or she felt the need to tear it in half, other than possibly wanting to make more work for me.

I kept the fortune, of course. I took it back to the register, and carefully taped it together. And here is what it said:

"Human Evolution: 'Wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints.'"

JANUSFILES 2 . . . ENTRY #0135 . . . CLOSE

To Everything There Is A Fortune

2010-07-17T13:09:00.004-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0134 . . . OPEN:

If I might paraphrase Forrest Gump just a little, fortune cookies are like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get.

That line has absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the entry. For some reason, though, my subconscious just told me that this would be a great opening line.

I grabbed takeout from Oriental House last night for dinner. It was one of those times when it was the best option, for various reasons.

I ordered the sesame chicken lunch special this time. I found it more than a little amusing when I cracked open the fortune cookie, because here's what the fortune said:

"For everything there is a season."

Sounds more than a little familiar, doesn't it? It's part of Ecclesiastes 3:1. You might recognize it more from the song "Turn! Turn! Turn!" by The Byrds.

It's always interesting when you instantly recognize whence the fortune came.

JANUSFILES 2 . . . ENTRY #0134 . . . CLOSE

Okay, That One's A Keeper

2010-07-03T15:05:00.005-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0133 . . . OPEN:

Since I started this particular online journal, I seem to notice more often when other people hold on tothe fortunes from their fortune cookies. And of course, whenever I spot one of those slips of paper, the first thing out of my mouth is usually, "What does the fortune say?"

Something like that happened late last night at work. A customer was buying alcohol, and of course, I asked to see her ID. When she brought it out, there was a fortune just in front of her driver's license. It didn't cover anything important (like her date of birth), but I spent a little more time than usual looking at the ID. Well, I was looking at both the ID and the fortune. I even read the fortune out loud, to make sure I got it right.

I think I told the customer that I was always a little curious when I see someone hanging on to a fortune; that I'm wondering what that fortune might be. Here's what this particular fortune said:

"Your love life will be happy and harmonious."

Okay, I can see why she decided to keep that one.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0133 . . . CLOSE

Outsourcing Fortune Sources?

2010-06-28T14:23:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0132 . . . OPEN:

Last night at work, a customer took out his wallet to pay for his purchases. In addition to pulling out a few bills of various denominations, he also inadvertantly pulled out the fortune from a fortune cookie.

I joked with him that fortunes were, unfortunately, not acceptable as legal tender. As it turns out, he's a little like me -- he likes to save his fortunes. I told him about my writing about fortunes, but I didn't have the chance to give the URL for this site.

I did ask to see the fortune that came out of his wallet. He let me see it, and copy it. It had to be one of the strangest fortunes I have ever encountered:

"Affirm it, visualize it, believe it, and it will actualize itself."

That's not what you would usually find in your fortune cookie. That actually sounds like something taken from Tony Robbins.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0132 . . . CLOSE

Not Doing THAT Again

2010-06-24T15:10:00.004-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0131 . . . OPEN:

Last time, I mentioned that I had had a few more customers ask me to run Powerball numbers for them based on what was on the fortune from their fortune cookie. I did, but I made them fill out playslips -- unlike the jerk from a couple of weeks ago.

The first one came in last Friday night. He wanted me to punch them in manually. I pointed him in the direction of the lottery station. When he asked why I couldn't punch them in manually, I think I told him something along the lines of my not wanting a line forming if other customers started coming in. I think I must have convinced him, because he filled out a playslip for me.

To be fair, I did show him how to fill out the playslip. And I did take a look at the fortune and the playslip once he was finished, to be certain he had filled it out correctly. I also took a look at the fortune, and wrote it down. Here's what it said:

"Fortune truly helps those who are of good judgement."

I didn't make note of his numbers. Since he did fill out his own playslip, I didn't see the need to treat him like I did the jerk. I hope this was one case where I was making good judgement.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0131 . . . CLOSE

Just Needed A Little Instruction

2010-06-21T15:00:00.006-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0130 . . . OPEN:

You may remember that a couple of weeks ago, I had a total jerk come in to where I work, and demand that I manually input numbers from a fortune cookie because he was just too lazy to fill out a Powerball playslip. In the past few days, I've had two more customers bring fortunes to me and want to play the numbers. There was a difference on both of these occasions. These customers filled out playslips.

The most recent was last night. A lady came in, and put four fortunes on the counter. She told me that she wanted to play the numbers on the fortunes for Powerball and Mega Millions, but she didn't know how to go about it.

Fortunately, things were on the quiet side at the time. I pointed her toward the lottery stand, and I told her bring me playslips for both, and a pencil.

When she returned, I placed the playslips side by side, and I told her, "Powerball and Mega Millions are basically played the same." Pointing to the two sections of the playslips, I said, "You pick five numbers from the top section, and then one in the bottom section for each play."

The lady took the Powerball playslip, and the first fortune. She marked the numbers as I had showed her, and asked me if she was doing it right with the first one. (She was.) She took the numbers from the other fortunes and filled them out, then repeated the process with the Mega Millions playslip. Once she was finished, I ran the playslips through the terminal, and handed her back the playslips and the tickets.

Once she filled out the playslips, she was finished with the fortunes, so she let me have them. Here is what the fortunes said:

"Listen to the wisdom of the old."
"Your ability to find the silly in the serious will take you far."
"Your ambitious nature will help you make a name for yourself."
"Your virtues are priceless treasures."

I'm not going to play any of her numbers, nor will I mention them here. She was being far too courteous for me to do that to her.

I will say one thing, though. That second fortune definitely applies to me.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0130 . . . CLOSE

Baci, Baci, Bang, Bang

2010-06-05T15:59:00.002-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0129 . . . OPEN:

About a week ago, I was in my local World Market, and I saw those little boxes of Baci back on the shelves. I hadn't seen them for a few months, and I had been wondering if World Market would be getting them back in stock. Naturally, I picked up a box.

It was a few days before I unwrapped the Baci. It was one of those things where I needed just a little bit of time to properly appreciate the chocolates. And of course, there were the love notes hidden the foil wrapper and the chocolate. Here's what the notes said this time around:

"Love directs your course." -- Kahlil Gibran
"Love is blind to faults, friendship loves them." -- Anonymous

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0129 . . . CLOSE

Just Too Damn Lazy

2010-05-25T16:27:00.006-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0128 . . . OPEN:

Every once in a while, I'll have a customer walk in after having dinner at Oriental House, go the the lottery stand, and fill out a Powerball playslip using the numbers that were on the fortune in their fortune cookie. Usually, the most I do is point them in the direction of the lottery stand, and of course run the playslip once they have filled it out.

Last night was a different story. A guy comes in, shoves his fortune at me, and then demands that I input the numbers on the fortune manually from the lottery terminal. And this is also when I have a couple of other customers as well. And the two or three times I try to point him in the direction of the lottery stand, he says, "All you have to do is . . . " and proceed to tell me what I have to do.

Yes, I know how to manually input the numbers. But if you go to most places that sell lottery tickets, they will usually tell you that unless you're playing a quick pick, you have to fill out a playslip. It's too time-consuming for the people behind the counter to punch in the numbers for every jackass who is too damn lazy to fill out a playslip.

I probably shouldn't have done it, but I punched in the numbers -- although I would have much rather punched out this incredibly rude and inconsiderate piece of work. And when I handed him his ticket, I rather pointedly said, "That is what the playslips are for, you know."

His response? "Oh, I've never filled out a playslip."

And people wonder why I sometimes want to bring a chainsaw to work.

Yes, he did leave unscathed. No, he won't be getting away with that little stunt if he ever tries it again.

He did leave the fortune behind. I'm not sure why, other than maybe I didn't give it back to him. Here's what it said:

"When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that is in itself a choice."

I've heard a number of variations on this one.

This jerk really pissed me off. As I said, I still have the fortune, and I think I may play those numbers myself for tomorrow's Powerball drawing. Here are those numbers:

28, 14, 35, 32, 49, PB 09.

If you play Powerball, you might want to play these numbers tomorrow night. I'm not guaranteeing that they will win, but it would satisfy my sense of justice to know that he would have to split the jackpot with who knows how many others because he was just too damn lazy to fill out his own playslip.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0128 . . . CLOSE

Waiting For A Title

2010-05-22T16:29:00.004-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0127 . . . OPEN:

Last night was the first time I had in a while to get something from Oriental House. For the most part, I have been bringing in something to eat -- Subway and Taco Bell have been the usual suspects. But Hale and I had enough overlap last night that I was able to walk over, place my order, and have them deliver it.

Last night, my choice was the chicken with garlic sauce lunch special. I think I was in the mood for something spicy -- and despite my requesting the mild version, I definitely got it. Still enjoyable, though.

And of course, there was the fortune cookie at the end of the meal. This time around, the fortune actually sounds like a word of ancient Chinese wisdom:

"The superior person is modest in his speech but exceeds in action."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0127 . . . CLOSE

Could You Please Just Go Away?

2010-04-24T13:07:00.006-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0126 . . . OPEN:

I know that Friday and Saturday nights at work are going to be a little on the insane side. It's part of the job; I accept it. But why do people seem to think that they constantly have to redefine the meaning of "insane"?

Last night at work was one of those nights. A night when the entirety of St. Matthews seemed to think that I would die of lonlieness if there wasn't a constant stream of people coming in to keep me company.

And for the record, no, that is not the case. I am not the Maytag repairman; I can handle being left alone. In fact, there are some parts of the job that I can do only when there is so one else around.

The good news is, getting dinner was not a problem. Hale and I had enough of an overlap that I was able to walk over to Oriental House before he clocked out, placed an order, and asked them to bring it over once it was ready. The bad news is, things apparently were just as crazy at Oriental House. It was almost an hour before they brought over my order. And it took me almost two hours to eat it, because no one wanted to leave me alone long enough to eat more than one or two bites at a time.

I ordered the Hong Kong Chicken lunch special last night; I think mainly because I hadn't had it in a while. It was satisfying -- whenever I was able to get more than a couple of bites in, that is.

And of course, there was the fortune cookie. Here's what the fortune said:

"Watch out for emergencies. They are your big chance."

If an emergency at work is any crazier than the norm, I have to wonder: Big chance for what?

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0126 . . . CLOSE

Open Sesame (Chicken), Close Hunger

2010-04-20T14:41:00.002-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0125 . . . OPEN:

Last night at work was . . . relatively peaceful. Especially after the previous three days. I usually make comparisons to Arkham Asylum, but Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights went even beyond that level of insanity.

I had eaten a late lunch, and when I was finally ready to get something for dinner, I went with Oriental House. (I had already planned that, to some extent.) Of course, the tricky part is always getting the three or four minutes necessary to lock up, walk over to Oriental House, and place the order. (Yes, I could place my order by phone, but getting away for just a couple of minutes clears the head a little.) I had a couple of false starts when, just as I was placing the "be right back" sign on the door, someone else would walk up.

When I finally made it to Oriental House, I ordered the sesame chicken lunch special. No particular reason; it just sounded the best to me last night. A few minutes later, they brought it over. And much to my surprise, I managed to eat most of it while it was still fairly hot.

And of course, there was the fortune cookie at the end of the meal. This time, the fortune said this:

"Self-confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0125 . . . CLOSE

Obviously, This Was Meant For Someone Else

2010-04-03T14:59:00.005-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0124 . . . OPEN:

Okay, now that April Fools Day is out of the way, it's back to the fortunes. (Nuclear-powered DeLorean not required.)

I got takeout from Oriental House last night. It was one of those nights when it was really the best choice. Fortunately for me, I didn't have to wait for a quiet moment to lock up and walk over to Oriental House. I probably wouldn't have been able to get over there at all. But with the way that things were on the schedule last night, I didn't have to worry. There was a couple of hours of overlap between the time I clocked in and when Hale clocked out. So, about 30 minutes or so before it was time for Hale to leave, I had him take over the register for a few minutes, and I walked over to Oriental House. I was able to place my order, and have a little bit of a stretch before going back to the insanity.

I ordered the bourbon chicken lunch special this time. Satisfying, tasty, and perfect for a night when I wasn't feeling in an adventurous mood.

I had to chuckle more than a little when I opened the fortune cookie and read the fortune:

"You become known for your generosity."

Okay, this fortune is just so not me. Yes, I may have my moments of generosity, but this particular fortune is unlike me most of the time.

I guess the fortune cookie can't get it right all the time.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0124 . . . CLOSE

No Fortunes Today

2010-04-01T17:04:00.005-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0123 . . . OPEN:

Even if I had eaten Chinese every day for the past week or more, I wouldn't be writing about it today. (As it happens, I haven't, so that isn't a factor for consideration. But I digress.)

If you haven't noticed, today is April Fools Day. To my way of thinking, this is far from the best day to be writing about something like fortunes. I mean, I could write the most outlandish story imaginable about an experience at a Chinese restaurant. And even if it were the absolute, complete, and unvarnished truth, someone out there would be saying, "Yeah, right. I know what today is."

On a similar note, I my last visit to a Chinese restaurant could have yielded one of the most incredibly funny fortunes that I have ever found in a fortune cookie. And again, there would be someone questioning the veracity of my entry, just by invoking today's date. Take a look at the previous entry, for instance. Would you believe it really happened that way if I posted it on April Fools Day?

On the other hand, I could write about finding the most mundane and commonplace of fortunes in a fortune cookie, and the response would be, "You couldn't come up with something better for April Fools Day?"

There's just no pleasing some people.

So, rather than trying to do either, I will simply leave you with my own observation of the day. Ponder its lesson well, Grasshopper:

Even the most sincere and serious of trusted friends may reveal a wickedly humorous streak on April Fools Day.

I hope you haven't been tricked too bad today.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0123 . . . CLOSE

Interesting Juxtaposition

2010-03-30T14:56:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0122 . . . OPEN:

Yesterday was one of those days when I realized that, somewhere around 7:00 PM, I realized that I was going to need a little more in the fuel tank if I was going to make it through the rest of the night without rude complaints from my stomach. Fortunately, things weren't too crazy after rush hour was over, and I had a few minutes where I could lock up and walk next door to Oriental House to get takeout.

I went with the beef with broccoli lunch special this time. I wasn't particularly in the mood to be adventurous, and beef with broccoli seemed like just the thing. About 15 minutes later, they brought my food over.

The fortune in the fortune cookie brought a little bit of amusement. Not so much for the fortune itself, which was this:

"A lifetime of happiness lies ahead of you."

The amusement came from the other side of the fortune. Like most fortune cookie fortunes, on the back side of the fortune was a word of Chinese. On this fortune, the word was zui, which means "drunk, tipsy."

Okay. does this mean that a lifetime of happiness lies ahead of me if I am drunk or tipsy?

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0122 . . . CLOSE

So When Do I Get It?

2010-03-14T15:55:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0121 . . . OPEN:

I think I have gone through just about all of the lunch specials at Oriental House. I'm probably not going to try the Pepper Steak, ever. That sounds like it is mostly bell pepper, and I am quite certain that I have made my views clear on bell pepper on numerous occasions.. Other than that, I think the one selection I hadn't tried was the General Tso's Chicken.

Last night, I had to be at work on the early side. And as I didn't really think about it beforehand, I fell back on Oriental House for lunch. This was easier said than done. Once I decided what I wanted, it took me over 30 minutes to lock up, walk next door to Oriental House, and place my order. Every time it looked like the lot was empty (in other words, when the coast was clear), and I was walking to the door with the "Be right back" sign in hand, someone else would walk up and scuttle my plans once again. One time, I had locked one of the doors, taped the sign to the door, and was outside and just about to lock the other door when someone decided that their day wouldn't be complete without making mine just a little bit more insane.

I mean, seriously, people! Do you have something against an overworked cashier getting something to stave off the pangs of hunger?

Once I did manage to get over to Oriental House, it took all of about three minutes to place my order, pay for it, and ask them to bring it over. And I have already suggested, I ordered the General Tso's Chicken with fried rice and an egg roll. Mild on the spicy side, please.

When the guy from Oriental House brought my food over a few minutes later, I think he was glad for the break. from what I could tell, they were even busier than I was. We talked for a minute or two. I was doing what I could to stretch out his relative peace as long as I could.

The food was delicious. Not too spicy, with large chunks of chicken, carrots, and zucchini. There were also a couple of chili peppers blended with everything else. I tried to bite into one, but it was dried, and not really conducive to eating. That attempt also released an additional bit of heat into the food. Not much, but enough to make me glad that I didn't order the full strength spiciness.

And of course, there was the fortune cookie at the end. Here's what the fortune said:

"Joy comes from peace today, save the adventure till next week."

Given the sort of week I have had at work this past week, I want to know one thing. Just when am I going to get that whole "peace today" thing?

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0121 . . . CLOSE

It's The Year Of The Tiger

2010-02-14T15:59:00.003-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0120 . . . OPEN:

It's the Year Of The Tiger, it's the thrill of the fight . . .

Okay, I'll stop with the impromptu karaoke. I couldn't resist, and let's face it, I won't have the opportunity to go with this riff again until 2022.

As you may or may have not noticed, today is the Chinese New Year. And in the Chinese zodiac, this is the year of the Tiger.

I learned one thing last night. The Chinese New Year is not a particularly good time to order takeout from a Chinese restaurant.

I learned this the hard way. I had not made any plans for dinner before getting to work, and so I went to my fallback choice of Oriental House. Besides, I remembered somewhat vaguely that this weekend was Chinese New Year, and I thought it would be somewhat appropriate to get takeout for dinner.

Well, during the time we were changing shifts, Hale told me that Oriental House was getting slammed yesterday. In fact, they were so busy at times that their parking lot was completely full, and people were parking in our parking lot.

It was somewhere around 8:00 PM before things were slow enough for me to lock up for a few minutes, and walk next door to place my order. Things were still busy for Oriental House, even if customers weren't parking in our lot any more. If the restaurant wasn't filled to capacity, it was pretty damn close. I can't remember ever seeing it that full before.

Fortunately, there wasn't much of a line at the register when I got there, so I was able to place my order somewhat quickly. And even more amazingly, they brought my order over within about 20 minutes.

I ordered the bourbon chicken lunch special last night. I also discovered that the best way to keep the sauce from being overly sweet is by adding soy sauce and hot mustard.

And here is what the fortune in my fortune cookie said:

"A kiss can beautify souls, hearts, and thoughts."

Pure coincidence that I received this particular fortune when I did, but it does seem an appropriate one for Valentine's Day.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0120 . . . CLOSE

THERE'S The Beef!

2010-02-09T15:01:00.002-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0119 . . . OPEN:

Last night was a really sucky night at work. There's no other way to describe it. Murphy's Law seemed to be in full force.

Just trying to get something to eat was one of the things that made the night sucky. I had not eaten much yesterday, and it seemed that the universe was conspiring against me to prevent me from getting anything else. And I was rapidly reaching the point where the lack of food was making me distinctly cranky.

Don't make me cranky. You won't like it when I'm cranky.

I think it was close to 8:30 before I managed to walk over to Oriental House to place my order. I ordered the Hunan Beef lunch special again. And this time, I made sure I specified the beef. I also had to repeat the order twice, because my my brain was so fried that I wasn't sure I had mentioned the other stuff (mild spice, no bell peppers).

Things definitely started feeling a little better once my order arrived. This time, it was the beef, and not the chicken. The food was good, and went a considerable way toward putting me in a better frame of mind.

And here's what the fortune in my fortune cookie said:

"You'll never know what you can do until you try."

Okay, I now know that I can handle a near-total meltdown at work. I think I would rather not have to repeat the experience again anytime soon.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0119 . . . CLOSE

I Distinctly Said Beef . . .

2010-02-06T14:09:00.002-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0118 . . . OPEN:

Dinner last night was takeout from Oriental House. My shift started a 4:00 PM, and quite frankly, they were the best option.

There were a few moments when I wasn't even sure that I would be able to get anything. Rush hour started right around 5:00, and once or twice, I was beginning to think that it was going to last right up until I closed at midnight. It wasn't quite that bad, but I still had way too many people coming in after 11:00. (The fewer people that come in after that time, the better. Call it a combination of paranoia, and a desire to start getting ready to close as soon as possible.)

It was somewhere around 8:00 PM before I could finally get a couple of minutes to lock up, walk over to Oriental House, and place my order.

I decided to try one of the few lunch specials that I hadn't tried yet. This special is listed on the menu as "Hunan Chicken Or Beef," and I think one of the reasons I hadn't tried it was because it's also listed as hot and spicy.

I already had my order in mind before I walked over to Oriental House. I told them I wanted Hunan Beef, no green peppers, mild spice. I paid, and they said that they would bring it over in a few minutes.

When they brought my order, I discovered that they didn't quite get it right. Instead of beef, I had Hunan chicken. They did get everything else right. Not too spicy, and definitely no green peppers. Next time, I will have to be certain to say that I want the beef.

And of course, there was the fortune cookie at the end. The fortune in this cookie read as follows:

"Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0118 . . . CLOSE

Just Keep Thinking That

2010-02-03T15:56:00.003-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTGRY #0117 . . . OPEN:

Monday night, I got takeout from Oriental House. This was one of those nights when the choice was planned, rather than being the fallback option. As is usually the case, there was an hour overlap in the schedule. I waited until 10 minutes or so before Hale left to walk over and place my order. I was a little surprised when they brought it over as quickly as they did.

I ordered the bourbon chicken lunch special Monday night. I like the dish, but sometimes I find that the sauce can be just a little too sweet. This was one of those times. When I mixed my fried rice with the remaining sauce, I needed some soy sauce to cut the sweetness just a little. A packet of the hot mustard that Chinese restaurants usually provide would have done the job even better, but they forgot to include one with this order.

Even with the possible over-sweetness, the food was still good. And at the end of the meal was the fortune cookie, with this fortune:

"You will lead a rich and successful life."

Yes, it would be nice if that particular fortune came true. I guess I just have to keep thinking positive thoughts while waiting for the right opportunity to come along.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTGRY #0117 . . . CLOSE

Nose Doubt

2010-01-29T14:26:00.003-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0116 . . . OPEN:

I went to my fallback option for dinner Tuesday night. This time, it was more planned than fallback. I had eaten a late lunch, so Oriental House was my best option for dinner.

I ordered it a little earlier than I originally planned. I decided to take advantage of the overlap in the schedule between when I arrived and when Hale, my co-worker, left. On the one hand, I didn't have to try to get a few quiet minutes to lock up long enough to go place my order. On the other hand, Hale needed to leave a little early, so I couldn't place my order near the end of the overlap as I was hoping to do.

I ordered the sesame chicken lunch special. From what Hale has said, this is one of his favorites, and it is one of the first things that he orders from a Chinese restaurant. He also mentioned that he didn't particularly like Oriental House's sesame chicken. But when my food was brought over, he said that my sesame chicken smelled better than the one he had ordered. Hale suspected that there must have been two different cooks involved, and I apparently got the better one.

Maybe I'm not being as critical, but I don't think I have ever had a bad meal from Oriental House. There might have been some unwanted bell peppers once or twice, but I can always remove those.

In any event, the food was great, once I was able to get to it. And of course, there was the fortune cookie, with this fortune:

"A mile walked with a friend contains only a hundred steps."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0116 . . . CLOSE

That's Absurd!

2010-01-27T16:02:00.005-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0115 . . . OPEN:

Saturday night, I went over to Oriental House to get takeout. I really hadn't thought about what I wanted to eat, so Oriental House became my fallback choice.

Of course, there was a point where I wasn't certain that I would even be able to rely on my fallback. It was one of those nights. A constant stream of people that left me wondering if I would even be able to lock up just for the five minutes or so it would take for me to walk next door, place my order, and walk back. I mean, is it really that hard to be left alone for just five minutes?

Fortunately, I was able to get those five minutes, and someone walked my order over about 15 or 20 minutes after that. I ordered the chicken with garlic sauce lunch special. And while it was spicy, it wasn't fire-breathing spicy. Maybe they remembered my preferences.

And of course, there was the fortune cookie at the end, with this fortune:

"Ideas you believe are absurd ultimately lead to success!"

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0115 . . . CLOSE

Two Ways To The Same Idea

2010-01-24T14:44:00.004-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0114 . . . OPEN:

I was at work a couple of nights ago. As one customer opened her wallet to get the payment for her purchase, I noticed a fortune from a fortune cookie in the ID slot, right in front of her driver's license.

Obviously, I was just a little curious as to what the fortune said. Part of it, of course, is because I'm always collecting fortunes. I was also wondering what it said because it seemed clear that she took this fortune to heart. I asked her if I could see the fortune, and she said, "Sure," turning her wallet so that I could get a better look at the fortune:

"Arriving at one goal is the starting point to another."

I can see why she kept that fortune. The message is a good one to keep in mind. My friend Bill Levy, through his alter ego of the philosopher Weng Shu, expressed the same idea, but in a slightly different wording:

"Chop wood, fetch water. Achieve enlightenment. Chop wood, fetch water."

Personally, I think Bill's version sound more like it came out of a fortune cookie.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0114 . . . CLOSE

Quotable Fortune

2010-01-10T17:26:00.003-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0113 . . . OPEN:

I had eaten a somewhat sizable lunch yesterday. I still thought I was going to need just a little something else to see me through the evening at work, though. And since I was cutting it a little closer than I had planned, I decided to get takeout from Oriental House.

I almost didn't get that. As soon as I walked in the door, Emma's first words were something along the lines of "Hurry up." Not a good sign, to say the least.

I managed to make it next door to Oriental House, and I ordered the subgum chicken chow mein lunch special. As I was paying for it, I asked the lady at the register if she could bring it over, "because Emma is about to chain me to the register." She was amused by my declaration.

When I got back, I discovered why Emma was in such a rush. When our manager had made the schedule, it had Emma leaving at 5:00 PM -- and me starting at 6:00 PM. Can anyone tell me what is wrong with this picture? For a number of reasons, Emma needed to clock out as quickly as possible. As in RIGHT NOW.

The food came a few minutes after Emma left as though the hounds of Hell were on her heels. Other than the especially rushed turnover, the evening wasn't too bad. The food was good. And here is what the fortune inside my fortune cookie said:

"No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted."

The line seemed familiar, so I turned to Google. The quote is from Aesop -- the moral to his fable "The Lion And The Mouse."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0113 . . . CLOSE

A Familiar Fortune

2010-01-04T20:20:00.005-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0112 . . . OPEN:

I was weighing my lunch options while on my way to work late this morning. The decision came up Lemongrass Cafe, for at least a couple of reasons. For one thing, I hadn't had takeout from there in quite a while. For another, I decided that, even though I enjoy it, I really didn't want Burger King today.

As usual, I went with one of their lunch specials. This time, it was shrimp chow mein, because it was something I hadn't tried before. Even though I didn't make this a specific New Year's resolution, I am going to try a few new things this year. Eat at some new restaurants -- or even at a couple where I haven't eaten in some time.

The chow mein was delicious, as I expected it to be. Besides the shrimp, there were a variety of vegetables, including mushrooms, bamboo shoots, bean sprouts, and celery. The shrimp were succulent, and the remaining sauce blended well with my brown rice.

And of course, there was the fortune cookie. What surprised me was that I recognized the fortune:

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

I knew I had seen the quote before. At first, I thought it was something that either Benjamin Franklin or Robert A. Heinlein had said. But I just Googled the quote, and it turns out that it was Eleanor Roosevelt who said it.

Good advice, whether in a fortune cookie or wherever Eleanor Roosevelt first said it.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0112 . . . CLOSE

Not A Hot Cookie, But Close

2010-01-01T13:51:00.003-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0111 . . . OPEN:

More than a few months ago, I wrote about finding fortune cookie-ish messages on the packets of taco sauce that Taco Bell provides. When I first noticed them, I found five different messages. And as far as I can tell, those have been the only messages. I guess Taco Bell didn't see the potential in putting additional messages on the packets.

Yesterday, though, I was getting lunch at Taco Bell. As I was waiting for my order to arrive, I glanced at the taco sauce packets again, and I noticed two things. First, the hot sauce was now in a green packet, instead of the orange color previously used. And on the packet, there was a new message of sorts:

"drivethrudiet.com"

Yes, there is an actual website with that address. And it is Taco Bell related. If you want to know more, you'll have to go the website yourself. (Hey, what fun would it be if I gave you all the information?)

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0111 . . . CLOSE

Pocket Fortune

2009-12-31T11:45:00.005-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0110 . . . OPEN:

A few days ago, I grabbed a jacket that I hadn't worn in quite some time. When I stuck my hand in one of the pockets, I realized that for whatever reason, I had not emptied the pockets the last time I wore it.

I spent a few minutes emptying the pockets. Most of it was stuff that could be thrown away. But as I was going through the odds and ends that were hiding in the pockets, I pulled out an old fortune from a fortune cookie.

I don't even remember when I last wore this jacket, so I have no idea from which restaurant the fortune cookie (and the fortune) came. But, here's what it said:

"You are cautious in showing your true self to others."

This is one fortune that does a fairly good job of describing me.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0110 . . . CLOSE

Delayed Thanksgiving Fortune, Sort Of

2009-12-08T15:59:00.006-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0109 . . . OPEN:

I went to 8 China Buffet for lunch today. I had planned to do it for Thanksgiving, but my timing had been a little off, and I wouldn't have been able to eat there and make it to work on time. So, this year I had to go with my backup choice for Thanksgiving dinner -- Golden Corral.

I still wanted to have lunch at 8 China at least one more time before the end of the year. Since I had the day off today, I decided that today would be as good a time as any.

I left the restaurant pleasantly stuffed -- maybe even a little overstuffed. I hereby confess, I probably overdo it just a little whenever I'm at any Chinese buffet.

I did manage to save just a little room for the fortune cookie. And here is what the fortune said:

"All the answers you need are right there in front of you!"

Well, if I'm on the Internet (as I am right now), that may indeed be the case. Either that, or if I'm reading the Hong Kong Book Of Kung Fu.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0109 . . . CLOSE

Nice Advice, But . . .

2009-12-05T14:16:00.003-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0108 . . . OPEN:

Last night at work, I discovered an abandoned fortune cookie by one of the registers. More than likely, one of my coworkers had opted for lunch inner at Oriental House, and forgot about the fortune cookie. I snagged the cookie, and when I cracked it open, here's what the fortune read:

"Don't forget to do good deeds as you accumulate wealth."

Very nice, very high-sounding advice. I might even follow it. It would really help if I could accumulate some of that wealth so I could do some sort of good deed.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0108 . . . CLOSE

Not The Oops I Was Dreading

2009-12-01T10:38:00.003-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0107 . . . OPEN:

Yesterday, I stopped by Lemongrass Cafe on my way to work to get lunch. I went with the Shrimp With Garlic Sauce lunch special. I was in the mood for something that I had eaten before.

It was only as I was getting to work that I suddenly said to myself, "Oh, crap." Shrimp With Garlic Sauce is one of several items on the menu that is flagged as being hot and spicy. They will alter the spice level to fit your preferences, but I had negelected to say anything in that regard when I placed my order. My first thought was that the default that Lemongrass Cafe used would be the highest level of spicy; something with more Scoville Units than I really wanted.

On the way to work, some of the garlic sauce had spilled onto the egg roll. When I took my first bite from the egg roll, I was pleasantly surprised. I did not immediately start belching fire, as I was thinking I might. Apparently, the default is the mild end of the scale.

After breathing a sigh of relief, I ate the rest of my lunch without any sense of dread. And of course, there was the fortune cookie at the end of the meal. The fortune read as follows:

"A family reunion in the coming months will be a tremendous success!"

This would have been better suited for my parents' wedding anniversary back in August, now that I think about it.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0107 . . . CLOSE

Lunch On The Fly

2009-11-21T12:56:00.003-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0106 . . . OPEN:

Yesterday, I decided to get lunch from Lemongrass Cafe. The main reason for my choice was that I hadn't picked up anything from there recently, and I was having something of a craving for their food. (It was also on my way to work from the Eline/St. Matthews library.)

I decided to get the Almond Fried Chicken lunch special, because I don't think I had ordered that from them before. (And because I hadn't bothered with breakfast, I also grabbed a couple of double cheeseburgers from Burger King on the way to work as well.)

When she saw my lunch, Emma wondered what I had ordered. She thought I had ordered something from Oriental House, and she didn't quite recognize it. It does look similar to a couple of Oriental House's lunch specials, but the addition of the almonds threw her off.

The food was delicious, as usual. And of course, there was the fortune cookie at the end of the meal, with the following fortune:

"Luck is coming your way."

[ADDENDUM: I was looking through previous entries, and it appears that I have ordered the Almond Fried Chicken before. And I will probably order it again, because I like it.]

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0106 . . . CLOSE

Once More, To The Mall

2009-11-05T19:01:00.002-05:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0105 . . . OPEN:

Yesterday, I made a quick stop by Jefferson Mall. Only a few minutes this time; I had gone by the post office, and was really waiting for the bus.

In fact, my main reason for even going into the mall was to use the restroom in the food court. Once I was finished there, I stopped by Max Orient. I gave into temptation, and bought a half dozen fortune cookies.

As usual, I waited until I was at the computer to crack them open. Here are the fortunes, in alphabetical order:

"A pleasant surprise is in store for you soon in the coming week."*
"Adjust finances -- make budgets, to improve your financial standing."
"Soon you will receive a letter from a loved one"**
"Unveil your ideas. Be ready to act on them."
"You will soon meet a life long kindred spirit."
"Your qualities overshadow your weaknesses."

*This one did turn out to be correct. I got my laptop out of the repair shop today. Nothing serious, thank goodness.

**These days, it's more likely to be an email.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0105 . . . CLOSE

Full Potential

2009-10-10T13:54:00.002-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0104 . . . OPEN:

One of my co-workers had takeout from Oriental House for lunch yesterday. The takeout box was still behind the counter when I was clocking in. The fact that he hadn't finished his lunch should have been something of an omen of what my own shift would be like.

Unlike the last time, he left his fortune cookie behind, for reasons unknown. More than likely, he just forgot about it. In any case, after he left, I grabbed it, and I opened it later, at my leisure. Here's what the fortune said:

"Help people reach their full potential. Catch them doing something right."

I think that may be one of the longer fortunes I've seen. Nice sentiment, though.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0104 . . . CLOSE

Quick Fallback

2009-10-03T15:40:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0103 . . . OPEN:

Yesterday was, as they say, one of those days. Problems with my laptop made a mess out of most of my plans for the afternoon. It was one of those times when I really didn't want to spend too much time trying to decide what I wanted to have for lunch at work.

So, I went with the fallback option -- getting something from Oriental House. This time, it was the Hong Kong chicken lunch special. I wasn't in the mood to try something different, and the Hong Kong chicken is familiar enough to be a good choice.

I was wondering this time if the fortune in the fortune cookie would have something to say in regards to my computer problems. Not really, as it turned out. Here's what it said:

"To hear, you must listen with your ears, and not your eyes."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0103 . . . CLOSE

A Kiss Of Friendship

2009-10-02T13:17:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0102 . . . OPEN:

I picked up another package of Baci chocolates recently. I really wish they were available in bags, just like Hershey Kisses or other similar chocolates. I would like to be able to have more than just a couple of bites on hand. (For all I know, Baci are packaged in bags, but if those bags aren't sold in my area, it doesn't do me much good, does it? But I digress . . . )

I managed to savor the blend of dark chocolate and hazelnuts as long as I could. And of course, there was the matter of very carefully unwrapping the chocolates, so as not to damage the love notes inside. The notes in both of these chocolates were attributed to that well-known writer "Anonymous." At least, I'm guessing that "Anonimo" translates to that. Anyway, here they are:

"Friendship brings great happiness with little gestures."
"Real friendship can be enjoyed in silence."

I suppose it was purely random chance that these two similarly themed notes ended up in the same box. Or maybe it was just one of those occasional bits of serendipity.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0102 . . . CLOSE

Make That Messages, Messages

2009-10-01T14:40:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0101 . . . OPEN:

I have had the material for this entry for a couple of weeks now. Not long after I wrote my last entry about the messages I found in Dove Promises, I had a few more. And of course, I saved the foil wrappers, with their messages on the inside.

I have been carrying the messages around with me since then. I seem to have been waiting for the right time to write about them, and I finally decided that there is no time like the present.

I had several repeats in this batch. In fact, I think there may have been more repeats this time around. But I did find three messages for the first time. And as always, I present them to you in alphabetical order:

"Do something spontaneous."
"Listen with your heart."
"Share a sunset."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0101 . . . CLOSE

Abandoned Fortune

2009-09-30T10:35:00.004-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0100 . . . OPEN:

It was toward the end of the night at work last night, and I was starting to clean things up. As I was sweeping, I noticed a familiar strip of paper on the lottery station. It was a fortune from a fortune cookie.

Actually, I'm surprised that I don't see this more often. After all, there is a Chinese restaurant right next door.

I am making a couple of assumptions about this fortune. First, I'm guessing that it came from Oriental House. Second, I'm guessing that the diner had decided to play the lottery using the "lucky numbers" on the back of the fortune. (In both cases, these fall into the category of "most likely scenario," but I have no way of knowing for certain.)

I'm not certain why someone would have left the fortune behind. Perhaps that someone felt that they no longer needed the fortune. In any case, here is what the fortune said:

"Your dream must be bigger than your fear."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0100 . . . CLOSE

He Got The Cookie; I Got The Fortune

2009-09-25T15:45:00.002-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0099 . . . OPEN:

When I started work yesterday afternoon, I noticed that the coworker for whom I was taking over had picked up Chinese takeout for lunch. (I'm guessing it was from Oriental House, but I didn't ask.) As I put a couple of things of mine on the counter, I noticed the fortune cookie, and I moved it out of the way so it wouldn't get crushed.

About 20 minutes or so before he left, my coworker finally unwrapped the cookie and cracked it open. I mentioned that I collected fortunes, and asked him if I could have it if he wasn't going to keep it. He said sure, and gave it to me after reading the fortune and pondering its meaning for several minutes:

"Your wisdom will influence others."

He thought that this was a good fortune, but he didn't elaborate on his musing. I will admit, it does have something of a nice ring to it.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0099 . . . CLOSE

Okay, But It Still Tastes Good

2009-09-23T17:27:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0098 . . . OPEN:

Chop suey is not authentically Chinese.

To the best of my knowledge, I was 11 or 12 the first time I read that little bit of information. It was mentioned in a book titled The Year Of The Jeep. The book also mentioned that chop suey was created in America by Chinese immigrants, but that was probably the extent of the information given on the subject. (It was more an incidental bit of information than anything else.)

I've been reading about chop suey more recently in Jennifer 8. Lee's book The Fortune Cookie Chronicles, and on Wikipedia's entry on the subject. Ms. Lee's book tells quite a few interesting stories about chop suey and its origins, but the only thing that can be said with any certainty is . . . that chop suey is not authentically Chinese, and that it was created in America by Chinese immigrants.

For one reason or another, I don't think I had ever had chop suey until last night. After taking a break from eating Chinese takeout at work for a few weeks, I was in the mood for it again. And the schedule had me coming in early enough that Oriental House was my best option. As I looked over the takeout menu, I glanced at the chop suey section, and said to myself, "Why not?"

I went with the beef chop suey -- or as it was listed on the menu, "sirloin of beef." When my order was brought out, it smelled wonderful.

Unfortunately, I didn't get a chance to eat it for a couple of hours. Surprisingly, it was still somewhat warm once I did get a chance to eat.

And the food tasted as good as it smelled when it was brought to me. Strips of beef cooked together with a variety of vegetables in brown sauce. Those included mushrooms (nice big chunks!), sliced water chestnuts, bean sprouts, celery, and cabbage. It was served with white rice.

I made one slight mistake this time. I ate too much of the rice first, and as a result, there wasn't enough to mix with the leftover sauce once I was finished. I won't make that mistake again.

And of course, I had a fortune cookie with my meal, with the following fortune:

"Silence is the great teacher, and to learn its lessons you must pay attention to it."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0098 . . . CLOSE

Promises, Promises

2009-09-03T13:49:00.003-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0097 . . . OPEN:

I indulged in a few Dove Promises the past few days. After my initial encounter, I knew to unwrap the chocolates carefully, so I could read the messages printed on the other side of the foil wrapper.

One of them was a repeat from that initial encounter -- "Trust with your heart, not your head." This leads me to believe that the people at Dove may not have a great variety of messages. I'll have to pay closer attention during future samplings of Dove Promises. I can easily foresee unwrapping five to eight Promises, and finding only one with a message I hadn't used before. I may even need to keep a list.

In any event, I did have three new messages in this particular batch. Here they are, in alphabetical order:

"Be a little mysterious."
"Chocolate. Always your Valentine."
"Discover how much your heart can hold."

Okay, I can really relate to the second one.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0097 . . . CLOSE

I KNEW There Were Four!

2009-09-02T14:29:00.004-04:00

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0096 . . . OPEN:

The last time I posted a Linda Collection entry, it had three fortunes. And as I said at the end of the entry, I could have sworn that I had pulled four fortune cookies out of the Ziploc bag.

As it turns out, I was right. I did grab four fortune cookies.

When I dropped the other fortune cookies in my backpack, this one bounced off and apparently landed in the box of stuff next to where I usually put my backpack. And last night, I found the cookie on floor adjacent to the box and my backpack, when it apparently fell off the box. I still don't know how I didn't notice the cookie during that time.

It's nice to know that my mind wasn't playing tricks on me. And here is what the fortune from that cookie said:

"It tastes sweet."

Okay, to borrow a line from Buffy Summers, do you think you can vague that one up a little more?

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0096 . . . CLOSE