Wednesday, April 6, 2011

It Did Wish More Than Once

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0166 . . . OPEN:


I dipped into the big bag of fortune cookies earlier today, and I pulled out another fortune that I previously encountered:

"If you wish to, you will have an opportunity."

And as was the case with the last duplicate I pulled out of this bag, it was a true duplicate. The lucky numbers on both fortunes were:

20 21 32 33 45 51

And this time, the mini-lesson in Chinese was a phrase. The phrase was "Have you any question?", which was transliterated as "NI you wenti ma?"

As for the fortune, yes, I would really wish to have an opportunity. Please have it shipped to my condo by UPS. Thank you very much.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0166 . . . CLOSE

Friday, April 1, 2011

Greetings Of The Day

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0165 . . . OPEN:


As I've mentioned before, today is not the best time for a new entry here. With half the Internet trying to pull some kind of joke on the other half, April Fools Day is never a good time to mention whatever fortune I most recently found in a fortune cookie.

If I found something completely outrageous, or incredibly funny, no one is going to believe me. One look at the date stamp, and the response is, "Yeah, right."

On the other hand, something completely run-of-the-mill is likely to be met with disbelief as well. Again, a quick glance at the date stamp (assuming that you're not fully aware of what the day is) earns a response of, "Is that the best you could do?"

So, I've decided that the best approach is to acknowledge the day, and state that I'm taking the day off from engaging in fortune cookie philosophy. Other than not posting an entry. But I do feel the urge to post something.

And since I conclude my April Fools Day entries with an observation or bit of advice on the day, here's my thought this year:

April Fools Day is the one day of the year when everyone seems to think they are Allen Funt.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0165 . . . CLOSE

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Get Back To Where You Once Belong

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0164 . . . OPEN:


As I've mentioned in the last couple of entries, I had been cleaning my condo in a semi-mad frenzied rush. I've been taking a break since last Thursday, mainly because I was just a little burned out, and I was needing something to restore what I laughingly refer to as my sanity.

Early this morning, I walked by the big bag of fortune cookies, and decided that it was time to pull out another cookie. I saw one on top that was partially broken, and further decided that it would be the cookie of the day. (For some reason, these cookies are not individually wrapped. I suspect that by the time I reach the end of the bag, I will be faced with a layer of fortune cookie fragments.)

Here is the fortune from today's cookie:

"You should be able to undertake and complete anything."

Hmmmm . . . I think the cookie is telling me that it's time to get back to cleaning.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0164 . . . CLOSE

Friday, March 25, 2011

A Baci For Destressing

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0163 . . . OPEN:


In my last entry, I mentioned that I was in the process of cleaning my condo. I still haven't completed it, but at least the main reason for doing so is out of the way.

I had spent most of the last couple of weeks trying to clean the place. I won't go into details, but I was doing this because someone was paying a visit that lasted, at most, 15 minutes. I also spent a good portion of the last couple of weeks stressing out over the visit, for two reasons. First, there was the reason for the visit, which, as I said, I would rather not mention the sordid details. Second, I'm not really not that good a housekeeper. In fact, my housecleaning skills do not come up to the high exacting standards of Oscar Madison.

Yesterday was the visit, and I was cleaning up until about 10 minutes before my visitor arrived. At that point, I realized that I had completed as much as was going to be completed. And it was time to face the visit itself.

As you perhaps may have already guessed, I don't entertain. In fact, I tend to stress out when someone else is in my condo, which probably explains my somewhat . . . relaxed attitude toward housecleaning. If I remember correctly, the last person in my condo (other than me, of course) was a plumber sometime last year.

By the time my visitor left, I was in need of something to destress me. I recently read that two good ways of dealing with stress were sex and chocolate. Well, one of those is not a viable alternative, and it would probably take more chocolate than I could comfortably consume to ameliorate my stress levels at the time. Fortunately, simply getting out of the condo for a few hours handled things quite nicely.

While I was doing the cleaning, I discovered a box of Baci that had gotten buried under some other stuff. The box (and they) were slightly smashed, but were otherwise all right.

Unwrapping these Baci proved to be a slight challenge. After all, I didn't want to damage the love notes underneath the foil. And I was rewarded for my efforts with these notes:

"Doubt thou the stars are fire . . . But never doubt my love." -- William Shakespeare
"The woman does not exist of whose beauty all men shall agree upon." -- G. Leopardi

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0163 . . . CLOSE

Saturday, March 19, 2011

I Really Hope So

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0162 . . . OPEN:


I pulled another fortune cookie out of the bag today. Here's the fortune:

"All your hard work will soon pay off."

At the moment, I'm in the process of cleaning my condo. It will be nice when the payoff does finally arrive.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0162 . . . CLOSE

Friday, March 11, 2011

I Hope It Wishes More Than Once

JANUSFILES 2 . . . ENTRY #0161 . . . OPEN:


I felt in the mood, so I pulled another fortune cookie from the bag. Here's today's fortune:

"If you wish to, you will have an opportunity."

Okay, I'm wishing. Among other things, I'm wishing that I will recognize said opportunity once it finally appears.

JANUSFILES 2 . . . ENTRY #0161 . . . CLOSE

Thursday, March 10, 2011

I Hope She's Cute, Too

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0160 . . . OPEN:


Time once again to reach into the mailbag . . . uh, make that the big bag of fortune cookies. Here's the fortune that was in today's cookie:

"Your future brings cheerful company and merry times."

I'm hoping that said cheerful company is female, and the merry times include the sharing of fortunes from fortune cookies.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0160 . . . CLOSE

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Feeling Like Karen Carpenter

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0159 . . . OPEN:


I reached into the big bag with just the slightest amount of trepidation. I couldn't get the same fortune three times in a row, could I? What were the odds on that happening? (Yeah, I know the quote: "Never tell me the odds!")

As it turns out, there was an entirely different fortune in this cookie:

"Soon you will be sitting on the top of the world."

Okay. And will I be looking down on creation while I'm on the top of the world?


JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0159 . . . CLOSE

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Not A Sad Song, Either

JANUSFILES 2 . . . ENTRY #0158 . . . OPEN:


When I came up with the idea of Project GFS1, I figured that I would encounter a duplicate fortune. The bag did start with 160 fortune cookies; it would be reasonable to assume that there are at least a couple of duplicates in the bag.

I just didn't think it would happen this quickly.

Here's the fortune from the cookie I pulled out of the bag yesterday:

"Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances."

Not only is the fortune the same; this time, it is an exact duplicate. The lucky numbers are the same:

06 13 17 25 43 46

And you might notice that some fortune cookies teach you a word or two of Chinese. The fortunes in these cookies do, and the word was the same in both instances. The word was "chopstick," which they transliterated as quite ze.

Time to start wondering how soon it will be before I encounter another duplicate. Or is encountering a triplicate too far-fetched to contemplate?

JANUSFILES 2 . . . ENTRY #0158 . . . CLOSE

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Apparently Not A Warm Puppy

JANUSFILES 2 . . . ENTRY #0157 . . . OPEN:


Today seemed like a good day to pull a fortune cookie out of the bag. So that's what I did, and here's the fortune:

"Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances."

Sounds to me like that old song lyric, "If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with." Or at least a variation on that theme.

JANUSFILES 2 . . . ENTRY #0157 . . . CLOSE

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Introducing Project GFS1

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0156 . . . OPEN:


Remember last entry, when I said that I already had something to replace the now-depleted bag of fortune cookies that my friend Linda gave me? I've been meaning to write about this for a couple of weeks now, and I finally got my butt in gear today.

This little project actually started February 3 -- Chinese New Year. When I went to Jefferson Mall, I also made a swing by the nearby GFS. Now, if you're unfamiliar with Gordon Food Service, I've occasionally described it as a great place to go if you're planning a party. Need to buy ketchup, chocolate syrup, soy sauce, or barbecue sauce by the gallon? GFS is the place to go. Planning a room party at your favorite sf convention, and need to feed a few hundred of your closest friends (some of whom you have just met for the first time)? You can find what you need at GFS. Trust me.

In a couple of previous visits to GFS, I noticed that they carried fortune cookies -- in bulk. More than likely, this is what your local Chinese restaurant buys when they get fortune cookies. After one visit, I thought that this might be an interesting source of material for this blog. If I haven't been in the mood for Chinese for a while, I can still write an entry. All I have to do is pull out a fortune cookie, and voila, instant entry.

As you probably have already guessed, I purchased a whole bunch of fortune cookies that day. "A whole bunch" in this case was a bag containing 160 fortune cookies. This bag should last me quite a while. Even if I didn't use any other source material for this blog, I could have enough entries for most of the year. (And I do plan to have using other sources. sooner or later, I'm going to have a craving for Chinese.)

As I said, it's about time I started using these cookies for the reason I bought them. Here is the first of many, many fortunes from that bag:

"You should be able to undertake and complete anything."

Hmmmm, kind of appropriate for a first entry, now that I think about it.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0156 . . . CLOSE

Monday, February 7, 2011

Linda Collection 8

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0155 . . . OPEN:


Well, I have finally reached the last of the fortune cookies that my friend Linda gave me. So unless Linda shows up at a club meeting with another big bag of fortune cookies, this will probably be the last Linda Collection.

Looking back, I see that I made the cookies last over two years. More importantly, these last cookies didn't taste stale, so it seems I didn't have to worry all much on that account. And I have decided on a replacement for the Linda Collection entries (more on that in a future entry). So for now, I present the fortunes (with comments by me in parentheses):

"You are a bundle of energy, always on the go."
(Well, most of the time, anyway.)

"You have a potential urge and the ability for accomplishment."
(Sounds promising.)

"Your dearest dream is coming true."
(You mean the identical triplet majorettes?)

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0155 . . . CLOSE

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Happenstance, Coincidence, . . . ?

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0154 . . . OPEN:


"Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life."

This makes the second time that I have discovered the same fortune twice in a batch of fortune cookies that I have bought. Granted, this isn't going to happen to most people. Most people probably aren't going to be picking up fortune cookies in bulk. Or if they are, the odds are more likely that they will probably be doing it for a party, and that they will not be opening all the cookies by themselves.

The last time this happened to me, I decided that the odds on something like this happening were along the lines of "astronomical." I also said that getting more specific would take someone like Charlie Eppes of the TV series Numb3rs to do the actual math.

Obviously, I need to redefine my idea of astronomical odds.

At the moment, I'm thinking of Ian Fleming's Goldfinger, and a line from the titular character: "Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence, three times is enemy action." I've seen a number of variations on this theme; one that might fit this instance more accurately is, "Once is an event, twice is circumstance, three times is a pattern."

It didn't surprise me the first time I encountered a fortune for the second time. I suspect that this sort of thing happens more often than people realize. I'm just noticing it because I hang on to my fortunes. Getting two at the same time was surprising -- and having it happen twice was even more so. Now, I find myself wondering how long it might be before it happens again.

I suppose the answer to that question depends on how often I buy a batch of fortunes.

Like the other duplicates, this pair had different sets of lucky numbers. But this particular company printed two sets of numbers on the back. One was "Daily Numbers," which was numbers for Pick 3, while the other set was the usual set of six numbers. Here's the numbers listed on one fortune:

Daily Numbers: 8 5 5
Lotto: 25 18 38 32 23 37

And here are the numbers from the other fortune:

Daily Numbers: 0 3 4
Lotto: 21 31 08 05 46 12

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0154 . . . CLOSE

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Eh, Happy New Year, Doc!

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0153 . . . OPEN:


If the title doesn't make any particular sense, imagine Bugs Bunny saying it.

Today is the Chinese New Year. Specifically, it is the Year Of The Rabbit, which is why I chose a title referencing that Oscar-winning rabbit.

Last year, I discovered that ordering takeout from a Chinese restaurant might not be the best idea. Oh well, at least it didn't fall on Super Bowl Sunday. That would probably be chaos squared, at the very least.

I went by Jefferson Mall today. After visiting the food court, I concluded that mall food court Chinese restaurants probably don't deal with the same sort of insanity on the Chinese New Year. The traffic at Max Orient -- indeed, the entire food court -- seemed to be fairly normal. Of course, when I made my stop, it was just after the usual lunch hour, and it was way too early for the dinner crowd.

I didn't have any fortunes on me, and I thought I should post some sort of entry today. So, as you may have guessed, I made a swing by Max Orient just to pick up some fortune cookies. I picked up my usual half dozen for $1, and I nibbled on the cookies after catching TARC.

Here are the fortunes, with some editorial comment by me (in parentheses):

"At 20 years of age the will reigns; at 30 the wit; at 40 the judgment."
(Okay, what happens after that?)

"Depart not from the path which fate has you assigned."
(How do you know that fate has assigned you a particular path until and unless you try to depart from it?)

"The best prophet of the future is the past."
(Those who do not learn from history, etc., etc.)

"When winter comes heaven will rain success on you."
(So far this winter, all heaven has rained on Louisville has been rain -- and snow.)

"Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life."
"Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life."
(Yeah, I got two cookies with the same fortune. I'm not sure if this means I should pay more attention to this one or not. I'll probably be writing another entry on this fortune later.)

And even though the Year Of The Pig was four years ago, I think it appropriate to end with the words of Bugs's friend Porky Pig:

"Th-Th-Th-That's All, Folks!"

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0153 . . . CLOSE

Monday, January 31, 2011

Other Fortune Platforms

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0152 . . . OPEN:


A little over a month ago, I posted my first working definition of "Fortune Cookie Philosophy." I have been giving the matter some additional thought since then, and I thought it might be a good idea to write about those musings while they are still more or less on my mind.

Of course, there are similar platforms for conveying the same ideas that you can find in the fortune of a fortune cookie. The first that comes to mind is the bumper sticker. It's even the same basic shape as the fortune. You probably don't find anything particularly profound on a bumper sticker, though. It's probably not a good idea, come to think of it; you probably don't want to be distracting the driver behind you too much at 70 MPH. Which means that you're more likely to find something along the lines of "My Labrador retriever is smarter than your honor student" than "What's hidden in an empty box?"

A platform more likely to mirror the fortune cookie is the button. I have amassed quite the collection of buttons over the years. I acquired most of them at the dealers rooms of many science fiction conventions, and as you might suspect, those do reflect the genre. Like this one from the early 1990s: "Mr. Data, did you just say, 'Oh, Boy!'?" In my mind, though, the passage of a few years would provide a funnier version: "Captain Archer, why did you just say, 'Oh, Boy!'?"

I think one of the best buttons I have seen was one that my brother picked up in England many years ago. It said, "If God had not wanted us to make dirty jokes, He would have come up with a more dignified means of reproducing the species." I love the understated humor, and I have found that it's impossible to read that line aloud in anything other than a British accent.

Finally, we have the T-shirt. Now, there is one big difference with this platform for espousing fortune cookie philosophy. You have just a little more room to express yourself, which can lead to something similar to the T-shirt I saw that begins, "Stop Reading This!" From that beginning, it goes on in smaller letters saying things like, "Seriously, I mean it. Stop reading now. Why are you still reading this?"

Of course, you can still use it to prove that brevity is indeed the soul of wit. For instance, there is the T-shirt that simply says, "Sorry Yet?" The O in sorry is the logo of Obama's 2008 campaign. (For the record, I was sorry as soon as the election results were announced. But if you think things are really screwed up, don't blame me -- I voted for John McCain.)

I have mentioned other platforms from time to time, in the entries with the "fortune-ish" tag. But these are three I haven't mentioned before, and thought were worth mentioning.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0152 . . . CLOSE

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Linda Collection 7

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0151 . . . OPEN:


You might have noticed that I have been somewhat conspicuous in my absence this month. There's a simple explanation, really. I haven't been in the mood for Chinese food recently. And if I don't get Chinese anywhere, that also means that I don't have any fortune cookies.

Well, I still have a few fortune cookies in that bag my friend Linda gave me. So, it's as good a reason as any to post another Linda Collection entry. (Unfortunately, I think I have only one more entry to go before I use up all of the fortune cookies.)

This time, I grabbed two cookies from the bag. Here's what the fortunes said:

"Your life becomes more and more of an adventure!"
"Your whole family are well."

All right, the second fortune sounds more than a little vague. And I'm wondering just what sort of adventure my life is going to become.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0151 . . . CLOSE

Friday, December 31, 2010

All Right, Now WHY?

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0150 . . . OPEN:


I was Kroger again earlier, and once again, I stopped by the bananas in the produce section. The bananas were somewhat depleted, but I noticed that among the bunches still on the display, there was more of a variety in the stickers than there were on my last visit.

There was one sticker in particular that caught my attention. It caught my attention primarily because it doesn't seem to make any sense:

"Place Sticker on Forehead. Smile."

(Please note that as usual, I am capitalizing it just as I saw it on the sticker.)

Now, could someone please tell me why anyone would want to put this sticker on their forehead? If I were to see someone sporting one of these stickers on their forehead, I would be wondering if they had been using the bananas to make a few too many banana daiquiris. Anyone have an explanation for this? Comments would be welcome.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0150 . . . CLOSE

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Stuck For An Entry

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0149 . . . OPEN:


I was doing a little grocery shopping earlier this evening. As I walked through the produce section, I took a look at the bananas. I was paying particular attention to the bananas.

The last time I wrote about banana stickers (or more precise, what was printed on them), I noticed an abundance of stickers that simply said "Wii," which I suspect is some kind of promotion with that video game system. (Possibly the Donkey Kong game specifically?) That seemed to be the case this time as well, although I also noticed a number of stickers bearing artwork that had been designed by consumers as part of a contest.

I did find one banana bearing a fortune-ish sticker. I didn't need any bananas today, so I simply took the sticker, so I would remember what it said:

"I ♥ Lunch Boxes."

Not a bad way of reminding people that bananas are a pretty decent choice for lunch if you're deciding to brown-bag it.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0149 . . . CLOSE

Saturday, December 25, 2010

A Working Definition . . . Maybe

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0148 . . . OPEN:


Ever since I started The Janus Files 2, I have been trying to think of a good (and reasonably brief) definition of the topic of this blog, which is, of course, "Fortune Cookie Philosophy." I mean, the phrase is probably one of those things that I hope makes the light bulb in your head turn on immediately. You'll see the phrase and think, Okay, I get it! On the other hand, if I were to press you for a definition, It might not be so easy to verbalize.

Have I confused everyone yet? I sincerely hope not.

In any event, I have been trying to put together a definition that makes sense (or something resembling it) to me. And I think I may have something that more or less fits my view of the term. So, here we go:

Fortune Cookie Philosophy is a collection of brief words of wisdom, quotes, or advice that can easily fit on the slip of paper tucked into a fortune cookie, or similar small space.

Hmmm . . . that is coming close to my ideal definition. I think it's the best I can do at the moment. Let's call it a work in progress.

I hope all of you are having a very Merry Christmas. Or as some of my Jewish friends would say, Happy Chinese Dinner And A Movie Day.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0148 . . . CLOSE

Monday, December 20, 2010

Linda Collection 6

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0147 . . . OPEN:


I noticed a few days ago that it had been some time since I posted an entry concerning that big bag of fortune cookies that my friend Linda gave me many months ago. I also realized that sooner or later, those cookies are probably going to go stale, so it might be a good idea to go ahead and finish the cookies before that happens.

This time, I pulled out five fortune cookies from the bag. No particular rhyme or reason to my selection, although I did select one cookie that was crushed. In any case, here's what the fortunes said:

"A cheerful letter or message is on its way to you."*
"Accept the next proposition you hear."
"Happiness always accompanies with you."
"If you have a job without aggravations, you don't have a job."**
"You are kind-hearted and hospitable, cheerful and well-liked."

*This time of year, that will probably be a Christmas card.
**There are aggravations, and then there are aggravations. When people seem hellbent on causing as many as possible, I can do without them, job or not.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0147 . . . CLOSE

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Fortune Crushing

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #146 . . . OPEN:


Recently, I stopped by Jefferson Mall. It had been some time since I had picked up some fortune cookies at Max Orient, so I decided to make a swing by the food court and get a half dozen cookies.

I put the bag of cookies in my backpack, and then quickly forgot about them. I was planning to crack them open and write about the fortunes either that day or the following day, but they were shoved . . . well, not quite to the bottom of the pack, but close enough.

I remembered that the cookies were still in my backpack today. Unearthing the bag didn't require quite the skills of Indiana Jones, but it came close.

After spending about two weeks in my backpack, I didn't have to crack open the cookies. They were more than cracked open at this point. In point of fact, they wee well on their way to being crushed. Fortunately, they hadn't been pulverized to dust just yet.

The crushed state of the cookies did make things easier when it came to extracting the fortune. All I had to do was open the wrapper -- very carefully, I might add -- and pull the fortune out from the crumbs. I then dumped the crumbs into my hand, and from there they went into my mouth.

Once I had disposed of the cookies, I had these fortunes:

"A man can fail many times, but he isn't a failure until he gives up."*
"All things come to him who goes after them."
"Love is as necessary to human beings as food and shelter."**
"Soothing your body are the name of the game today."
"The path is getting easier from here on out. Luck is helping."
"Time heals all wounds."***


*I keep seeing running into a variant of this whenever I run out of time on Jewel Quest 3.
**If that's the case, I'm practically anorexic.
***I know I've seen this quote before, but who said it?

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0146 . . . CLOSE

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Delay Not?

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0145 . . . OPEN:


I had lunch at #1 Asian Buffet yesterday. I was at Mid-City Mall at the time, and I was just in the mood for something substantial.

Now, the last time I ate there, I mentioned that I felt uncomfortably overstuffed when I left. I didn't know why, because I didn't think I had eaten more than I usually do. This time was different. I was feeling a little stuffed when I was finished, but I didn't have the feeling that I had last time. The feeling that I described as having a large lump of spent uranium just lying there in my stomach.

I ended up with two fortune cookies this time. I didn't open them until this afternoon, which gives the first fortune just a little bit of irony:

"Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone."

Okay, that sounds like a not-so-subtle reminder to write the entry as soon after getting the fortune cookie as possible. And then, there was the other fortune:

"What's hidden in an empty box?"

Now, that sounds like something that The Riddler would send Batman in advance of his next crime.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0145 . . . CLOSE

Friday, October 29, 2010

A Fitting Fortune From A Far-Off Friend

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0144 . . . OPEN:


I have mentioned once or twice that some of my friends know about my penchant for collecting fortunes. And occasionally, they will remember to save their fortunes for me.

Last week, though, I received a fortune from an entirely unexpected friendly source. Said fortune arrived with a regular mailing from John Hertz.

Like me, John Hertz is a science fiction fan. He is a wonderful gentleman, and the recipient of one of SF fandom's highest honors, the Big Heart Award. (And trust me, it is well deserved.) Since he lives in Los Angeles, we usually run into each other at the occasional convention. Most of our communication is conducted through the mail.

One of Mr. Hertz's (many) fannish activities is Vanamonde, his contribution to the amateur press association APA-L. Every so often, I will receive an envelope containing several past installments of Vanamonde; usually 10 or so. I always find them interesting, if sometimes a little tricky follow. I once told Mr. Hertz that reading Vanamonde was like listening to a phone conversation where you couldn't hear the other side. (I presume that the other half of those conversations are taking place in the pages of other contributors' apa-zines.)

As I said, last week I received the latest bundle of Vanamonde. "Latest" is relatively speaking; the issues are from several months previous, and I suspect are from what are left over after APA-L is collated. As I was reading issue #845, I noticed at the bottom what could only be the fortune from a fortune cookie. It was in a different typeface than what he normally uses, and there were a series of numbers that looked like "lucky numbers" under the line:

"Listen to friends with an ear to the future."

Mr. Hertz commented that he planned to seek out such friends at Anticipation, 2009's World Science Fiction Convention.

Definitely one of those occasions when someone got precisely the right fortune.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0144 . . . CLOSE

Thursday, October 28, 2010

That's Something New

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0143 . . . OPEN:


Late this morning, there was something that I absolutely had to get some Chinese takeout today. I think it was my stomach rumbling, and the fact that at the time, China 1 was the closest place to get something to stop the rumbling.

When I walked through the door, I was more than a little startled. There was a white guy sitting at the cash register. That isn't something you normally see at a Chinese restaurant. Judging from some of the difficulties he had, I got the impression that he hadn't been working there long.

I ordered the shrimp with garlic sauce lunch special -- completely forgetting that this was what I ordered the last time. (I do like to order different things, just to see if there is something I haven't tried yet.) I must have remembered ordering that in the past at least subconsciously, because I asked if it had bell pepper, and asked them to hold it when they said yes.

China 1 was a side trip on my way to the library. There were a couple of benches outside the building, and I settled there to eat my lunch. (The library has this thing about people bringing food and drink into the library.)

When I ordered, I thought I also told them to make it less spicy. Either the cook has a different idea of what constitutes "less spicy" than I do, or they didn't catch that part of my order. The garlic sauce was just a little spicier than I thought it would be. It wasn't too bad by the time I stirred the remaining sauce into the fried rice.

And of course, capping my lunch was the fortune cookie. Here's the fortune:

"If you care enough for a result, you will most certainly attain it."

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0143 . . . CLOSE

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

That's Potassium With A "K"

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0142 . . . OPEN:


I bought a bunch of bananas earlier today. And as I looked over the bunches, I was also taking a good look at the stickers.

I was thinking of getting some bananas a few days ago. But when I started looking at what was available, the only stickers besides those bearing the Chiquita logo simply said, "Wii." I am guessing that Chiquita is doing some sort of promotion in conjunction with the Wii game system, but I didn't see anything to confirm my guess.

Today, however, was a different story. Oh, I saw plenty of the "Wii" stickers, but I also saw a variety of the fortune-ish stickers that I saw about a month ago. I saw one bunch that had a couple of different stickers, so of course that was the bunch I selected. Here's what the stickers said:

"The Food that Fights for You!"
"Yum, Yum, Potassi-yum!"

These are capitalized exactly as they were on the stickers. I'm not sure why some words were capitalized the way they were. And I like the second sticker's way of emphasizing bananas as a good source of potassium.

JANUSFILES2 . . . ENTRY #0142 . . . CLOSE