Just Think About It

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I found another one of the Fantasm buttons a few days ago.  I think it may be my favorite of the bunch, and I've been wearing it for the past couple of days.  I mentioned that some of the buttons are on the edgy side, and this is definitely one of those:

"Klingons don't need ribbed condoms."

Think about it for a few minutes.  And please finish all drinks before you start thinking.  I will not be responsible for anything that might have to be cleaned off your monitor.

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Fantasmic!

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Several years ago, I remember picking up a number of buttons from one table at Chattacon (a convention held in Chattanooga).  This particular table was run by Fantasm, a convention that billed themselves as "the convention your mother warned you about."  (I don't think Fantasm is being held anymore.  If I'm not mistaken, they have been succeeded by another convention called Frolicon.)

The Fantasm buttons were . . . shall we say, just little edgier than most of the buttons you might find at a convention.  And for me, that was part of the attraction.  To give you an example, this one is probably the least edgy of the bunch:

"The gene pool could use some Clorox."

Just imagine what some of the others say.  Or you don't have to; I'll be writing about them sooner or later.

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The Power Of Imagination

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I've been wearing a button for at two or three weeks now.  I've been meaning to write about it for some time now, but it seems that every time I'm on Blogger, I completely forget about the button, even though it's on my chest.

Well, this time, that's not going to happen.  I've removed it from my shirt for the moment, and sitting on the table right next to my laptop where I can clearly see it.

This is another button that I picked up at a convention many years ago.  And I think what it says is something that just about every fan of SF would readily agree with:

"In the world of words, the imagination is one of the forces of nature."

The imagination is the power that draws us into the genre in the beginning.  What the writer's imagination has produced sparks something in us, and with some of us, urges us into harnessing that force of nature ourselves.

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Whirl Away!

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Earlier this week, I was going by a church near my condo, and I saw the following message on their sign:

"Visualize world peace."

I have seen this sentiment expressed in a number of ways over the years. Besides that sign, I have seen it on buttons, T-shirts, and bumper stickers. I remember that at one place where I worked, a receptionist had the message on her desk. If I'm remembering correctly, it was on a paperweight. I do remember that it was readily seen by anyone walking by her desk.

But I suppose the thing that comes to mind most readily whenever I see that message is something similar that I saw on a button. It was one of dozens upon dozens of buttons that you can find for sale at any SF convention. Most of the messages will, of course, have something to do with the genre -- something like "Captain Archer, why did you just say, 'Oh, boy'?"

But in this case, the message was a somewhat snarky twist on the message above. I will admit, at first, I didn't get it, mainly because I don't think I had seen "Visualize world peace" previously. But the dealer explained it, and I quickly understood. And now, I cannot see that message without this version quickly coming to mind:

"Visualize whirled peas."

Oh, and that receptionist I mentioned? I wrote the alternate version on a sheet of paper, and when I went by her desk, I gestured to her paperweight, saying, "I've got another version of that." I showed her the paper, and she started laughing.

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A Fitting Fortune From A Far-Off Friend

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I have mentioned once or twice that some of my friends know about my penchant for collecting fortunes. And occasionally, they will remember to save their fortunes for me.

Last week, though, I received a fortune from an entirely unexpected friendly source. Said fortune arrived with a regular mailing from John Hertz.

Like me, John Hertz is a science fiction fan. He is a wonderful gentleman, and the recipient of one of SF fandom's highest honors, the Big Heart Award. (And trust me, it is well deserved.) Since he lives in Los Angeles, we usually run into each other at the occasional convention. Most of our communication is conducted through the mail.

One of Mr. Hertz's (many) fannish activities is Vanamonde, his contribution to the amateur press association APA-L. Every so often, I will receive an envelope containing several past installments of Vanamonde; usually 10 or so. I always find them interesting, if sometimes a little tricky follow. I once told Mr. Hertz that reading Vanamonde was like listening to a phone conversation where you couldn't hear the other side. (I presume that the other half of those conversations are taking place in the pages of other contributors' apa-zines.)

As I said, last week I received the latest bundle of Vanamonde. "Latest" is relatively speaking; the issues are from several months previous, and I suspect are from what are left over after APA-L is collated. As I was reading issue #845, I noticed at the bottom what could only be the fortune from a fortune cookie. It was in a different typeface than what he normally uses, and there were a series of numbers that looked like "lucky numbers" under the line:

"Listen to friends with an ear to the future."

Mr. Hertz commented that he planned to seek out such friends at Anticipation, 2009's World Science Fiction Convention.

Definitely one of those occasions when someone got precisely the right fortune.

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Fannish Fortunes

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I found another batch of fortunes on one of my bookshelves a few days ago. This particular batch of fortunes is particularly special, though. I've been trying to think of a good description of these fortunes, and I think the best thing to call them is "fannish fortunes."

There are fortune cookie producers that do custom orders. I've never ordered any myself, but I suspect you give the company the messages you want in the fortunes, and they print them and insert the fortunes in the cookies, then ship the finished cookies to your door.

I've encountered fortune cookies with a science fiction theme on a couple of occasions. My first was at the 1992 World Science Fiction Convention, Magicon. The closing ceremonies were partly conducted by ConFrancisco, the 1993 Worldcon. During their part of the ceremonies, the people from ConFrancisco handed out custom-made fortune cookies. I remember that the fortune in my cookie said something about my amazing everyone with my hall costume at ConFrancisco. I'll have to dig out the issue of FOSFAX with my con report to get the precise wording of the fortune.

My next encounter with fannish fortune cookies was several years later. I'm trying to remember where I obtained these fortunes. I do know that it was at a science fiction convention, most likely at a Worldcon. It could have been at an event like the masquerade, Hugo Awards ceremony, or closing ceremonies. (I'm fairly certain that it wasn’t at an opening ceremonies.) It might also have been at a room party where I got them. In any case, besides the fortune in my own cookie, I managed to pick up a few others that people had discarded after reading them.

I do know that, wherever I found these fortunes, it was after the release of the movie Independence Day (for reasons that will soon become clear). There is also a strong probability that it was after the release of The Lion King. I can't give much more in the way of clues beyond that. Maybe someone reading this will remember who distributed these cookies, and will leave a comment.

These particular fortunes are geared toward members of SF fandom, and one or two of them may leave you scratching your head if you aren't a fan. If you don't understand, leave a comment, and I will try to elucidate.

"Dragons, unicorns, and penguins are out. Cows are in. Meerkats are next."
"Earn big bucks writing fortunes at home in your spare time!"
"Stephen King will write your biography."
"The next set of MAGIC cards will be based on your college years."
"William Shatner will ask for your recommendation when buying his new hairpiece."
"You will astonish the world by explaining coherently how 'Independence Day' abbreviates to 'ID4'."
"You will be offered a chance to chair the Minneapolis in 73 Worldcon bid."
"You will restore tradition to fandom: Your mimeo will break down and get ink on your hands."
"Your next short story will be selected for The Last Dangerous Visions."

As I said, if you don’t understand something, feel free to ask.

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